jungkook
i missed you
It had been over a year since you had last seen him. You had almost forgotten how he furrowed his eyebrows when he was concentrated or how he once faintly smiled as the teacher had choked on her water. His facial features had begun to fade in your head and you often tried to remember what exactly his voice sounded like. Time heals they say, but time also erases your memories. You hated that. This probably explained your obsession with documenting everything in your life. You were that girl that wrote in her diary every night, drew random people she saw here and there in her notebook and took many pictures. You wanted every moment to last forever, you wanted to remember all of it. And it had all started with him. Ever since you had first seen him in middle school, you saw life through different eyes. It wasn't that you had fallen in love with him at first sight. It wasn't like that at all. He had only peeked your interest. Your eyes would often wander to him during class, watching him doodle stuff in his textbooks. He was always so quiet and reserved. Unlike the other boys in your class, he was very mature, never participating in the pranks the boys pulled. He didn't talk much and he had no friends in school. You would have befriended him, but you could tell that he didn't want to have friends. He was content by himself, he had no friends by choice. No one understood this, everyone thought of him as a freak. But you could see through that. You knew that he was a very special person. Maybe it was his mysterious aura that had intrigued you or maybe you were interested in him because you could see a part of yourself in him. Either way, Jeon Jungkook became a prominent figure in your life in your early teen years and stayed that way. Your paths never parted. The both of you were always in the same class. After middle school, you attended the same high school and had most courses together. For years Jungkook had been there with you without really being there for you. You didn't need to talk to him to feel a connection to him. Though it sounds really cheesy, you believed that the two of you were linked by fate. He had sneaked into your heart without you even knowing.
Puberty worked its wonders on him, and he developed into a very attractive young man, that had all girls' heart fluttering. The 'freak' suddenly became everybody's sweetheart. Over the years you watched many girls try their luck and make a move, but Jungkook rejected them all. He just wasn't interested. He was focused on himself. Anyone would be able to tell that he was a gem. Anything he did, he was good at. His skill set was baffling. He aced every test, was athletic, and he could draw as well. With everything, he did he left you in awe. It felt as if he was your childhood friend and you knew everything about him. Without even realizing you always left a good word about him when people spoke about him. You praised him whenever he was mentioned in a conversation. He was clueless to how much you cared about him, but you didn't need him to know. You were going to love and support him either way. You weren't expecting a reward, you weren't hoping that he would notice you and fall in love with you. Of course, you fantasized about him and imagined a universe in which he loved you back, but you were content as long as he was. It fulfilled you more to see him succeed and be happy.
You were happy as long as he was there. To watch him from afar was more than enough for you. So when one day Jungkook disappeared, your world was shaken up. The teacher came and announced that Jungkook was no longer attending our school without further explanations. People came up with various theories and rumors spread around the whole school, but no one really knew why he had left and where he had gone to. It felt like he had only been a dream. He had disappeared just like that without any warnings and no goodbyes. It hurt you deeply. You felt betrayed in a way, even though you knew he had no responsibilities towards you. You were nothing to him. Just because he was everything to you, didn't mean that he owed you anything. Just like he had no friends by choice, you had chosen to love him without him requiting your feelings.
