SAFE PLACE...SHAWN MENDES

twenty-two; another one

SERENITY HUDSON
—

My eyes stared at the snow falling down as Shawn's arms were wrap around me. We both decided to go to The Hampton for Christmas, the girls were dreaming to go back there so we thought it would be cool.

"I will never get tired of this view." I whispered, grabbing his hands in mine.

Shawn hummed, kissing my cheek. "I love it there." He told me softly. "We should go downstairs, hunny. Your family should be here."

"You're right." I replied, walking down. "Will you go to dad's grave with me?"

Shawn smiled sweetly and nodded his head. "You know I will."

I whispered a 'thank you' before joining our family. Olly was next to his girlfriend, smile on his face, his hand on her pregnant belly. I still couldn't believe that Olly was going to be a dad.

"Cariño, drink your beer." Told me my mom. "Come on! Be fun for once, I'll put the girls to bed."

I winced. "I don't know..." I mumbled. "The girls will need me and—"

Olly and Debby groaned. "Shut up, pendeja and drink that beer for gods sake." Complained Olly.

Debby laughed out loud shaking her head. "I can't believe you're about to be a dad. No offense to you Penelope but Olly is so fucking dumb."

Shawn giggled next to me. "He's not that dumb." Argued my husband.

Olly clapped his hands together, winking at Shawn. "That's my man. See! He's nice unlike y'all."

Debby arched her eyebrow. "Shawn... Olly is so damn stupid. Remember when he fell onto your wedding cake cause that tonto was too drunk to stand up."

Penelope let out a little giggle. "I remember that."

"Debby you're not better." Said Olly to defend himself.

I hummed. "Fuck, definitely not. Y'all are not siblings for nothing." I laughed. "Remember when you came back with me to New York and, told me that you and Debby thought Shawn was my sex friend."

"Oh my god, I remember." Shawn laughed. "Olly was definitely something else back when I met him."

Olly's eyes widened. "No I wasn't!"

"I swear you were." Replied my man.

My cousin shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe... But I changed now."

"Bud, I thought you were gay until you brought Penelope home." Said Uncle Steven.

My mom cackled. "A part of me still think you are." She said drinking her red wine.

Everyone gasped. "Even with a damn child on his way!" Yelled Olly.

Grandpa slapped Olly on the head, making him stop. "Stop yelling, the kids are in bed."

"Sorry Grandpa." Mumbled Olly.

I cleared my throat, standing up. "Um, Shawn and I are going to walk outside if y'all don't mind." I told my family as they all shook their head.

"Going to dad's grave?" Asked my mom.

Shawn nodded his head. "Yeah, we'll be back by midnight."

She giggled. "You guys are old enough to come back whenever you want. Just be careful." She stated.

We put our coats on and headed outside, the cold breeze hit my face as I slowly walked to the cemetery. I can't count all the time I walked this way and cried my eyes out as soon as I approached it.

Losing my dad was the worst feeling in the whole world. I still remember when we got this call from the hospital telling us that my dad didn't go through the chemotherapy, he was too weak to live. Too weak, that's what they said.

"You sure you want to go?" Asked Shawn as he saw my face. "Babe?"

I nodded, grabbing his hand. "Of course, I want to tell him something." I smiled to him.

As I walked I could see the famous tree where I used to sit down and just talk to my dad. Mixed feelings consumed me while we walked up the hill. We reached his grave and sat down.

"I think I never told you but I liked your dad's name." Told the curly hair next to me. "If we have a boy, I want to call him that way."

I gasped slowly turning my head towards my husband. "What? You would do that?"

"Of course." He shrugged. "It's a dope name and I think our son would look badass with that name."

I cackled while shaking my head. "You're crazy but it's a good idea, I like it." I looked at my dad's grave and just thought of what I was going to say. "Hey dad..." I whispered.

"I can leave if you want—?" Murmured Shawn

I shook my head, grabbing his hand in mine. "No, I want you to stay." He offered me a sweet smile. "Except if you want to go..."

"No I will stay." He replied.

I just started ranting about moving to Canada, the girls growing up too fast, me getting married or Olly who was about to be a dad for the first time.

I also told him that I was finally writing, even though I was writing on daily things. There was still a chance for me to write my own book and maybe more in the future.

"I love spending time here." Whispered Shawn, watching me. He's been quiet since we got here, he let me talk and just observed. "I love listening to you rant."

"Imagine if we never met— I would probably still be here and rant about how I'm still didn't meet my soulmate." I chuckled. "Yeah, I would be pretty miserable."

"But look at us." He winked. "Married, in love, parents. What better?" He mumbled.

I smiled cheekily. "Nothing, this is the better than I imagined." I said kissing his lips gently. "It's getting late, I just have one last thing to say."

"Yeah, sure go ahead." He replied quickly.

I tuck a piece of my hair behind my ear as I smiled to myself. "So, um, you know how you always dreamt about me having a boy so you could take him fishing and hunting. Well, I recently learned that I'm pregnant..."

My husband next to me let out a huge gasp as he covered his mouth. "Wait, are you really?"

"I'm serious, Shawn." I replied. "I think I'm ready to have this little baby."

"How many weeks?" He asked.

I met his eyes, already tearing up. "Already a month." Tears rolled down his cheeks. "Stop, love. You're going to make me cry."

He sighed. "Sorry, I'm just happy." He told me, wrapping his arms around me. "I can't believe it."

"Me neither." I said earning a little laugh from him.