An Unexpected Love

DG -38- Cry

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-•-SOYUN-•-

I hurriedly grabbed my coat as I enter the cab.

I gasp for air since I'm like a human that didn't breathe for almost an hour since I'm busy packing my things and bring it to my office.

I don't have anyone else in our house here in States. Ms. Lydia prefer to stay with her two sons in Korea so I lived all by myself.

I told the driver where the company was and in any minutes I'm already in front of the company of my family. Sighs.

I entered as many employees greets me with their smile.

That's the problem in here. Since I went here in States, my employee didn't saw me even smiling or happy. I don't know why.

I went to my office so I can put my things over there. I don't have a special meeting today, just the sales and marketing of our company.

Someone knock on the door..

"Come in.." I answered while opening my laptop.

Karen went in front of me as she submit the paper I told her last night that she need to type it. "Thank You.." I said without looking at her.

"Ma'am.. Where's the list of bills that we need to pay?" She ask.

"Just look at there.." I pointed at the bunch of paper in my desk.

She went beside of my table and looking for it.

I just continue my typing when she sighs and look at me. I stop on what am I doing and look at her. "Do you find it?"

"Uh oh." She shook her head as she wipe her sweat. Sweat? It's so cold in here!

"Uhh. Wait me in 30 minutes. I'm going back home. Sorry!" I told her as I quickly put my laptop in my bag and hurriedly went outside of the company without even listening to a reply of Karen.

It's me. I'm not acting like a boss in here. I just act like an employee too. I don't want them to see me like a boss in here. I just want them to see me that were just average.

"Ma'aaaaaam!" She called out so I stop from my walk-run. "I'm going with you Ma'am!!" She run towards me and smiled.

"Uh.. No.. No.." I disagreed.

"Please?" She pleaded.

* * *

"WOOOOOW! Your house Ma'am is so effin' big Ma'am!!" She was amazed in our house.

She giggles when I'm unlocking my house. "Omo! I'm so excited!"

I open the house and went to my table and checked papers under it.

I can see in my peripheral vision that she's amazingly in our house. She even look at the picture frame one by one and look at my kitchen. She even look up to see my room and look at me.

"Where's Taehyung Oppa?" She ask nowhere.

I stopped from what am I doing as I froze in here. My heart skips beat. The sweat were flowing down on my face as like there's a billion of people were stabbing it.

I shook my head in a response and continue my work. She didn't know on what happened to me and Taehyung past 5 months ago.

8months.. 8 months have passed but why there's still Kim Taehyung in my heart?!

"Uuhm.. Where's your baby Ma'am? I thought you were pregnant that's why you stop from working in Korea?"

Sighs.

Anytime, I want to cry. Anytime, I want to kill myself. And anytime, I want to die.

I closed my eyes then sighs, "Taehyung and I were over.." I clenched my fist and lip my lower lip to prevent from crying and tears flows down. "My baby died."

My face were shaking. I can't resist it anymore. A tear roll down in my face as I quickly hid my face to her.

"Ma'am.. Ma'am.." She called out with her broken and shaky voice. She hugged me tightly and caressed my hair. "So-sorry.."

"It's fine.." I wiped my tears deeply, I want to make sure that there's no more tears that will flow in my face anytime I saw a sign of him.

"We need just to accept it."

* * *

"UUUUUUUURGH!!" I gripped my hair in frustration as I crumpled the paper I'm holding with.

A tear roll down in my face as I couldn't help it but to cry. I embraced my knee, buried my face between my knees as I cried harder.

I put the back of my palm in my mouth so I can avoid the noise I can do anytime. I can't stop from sobbing till I lost my breathing.

I'm gasping for air when the door open and it's Karen, with her pity eyes and pleading face like anytime, she's going to cry too.

"Ma'am.." Her voice was broken when she handed me a letter again.

I get the letter while my hand was shaking. Is these again?

"Ma'am.." She sighs, "Please Ma'am.. I'm going to sent you home.. Just not here in the bathroom Ma'am.." She closed her eyes like she already gave up on me.

That's it? All of them were already gave up on me! Taehyung. My Oppas. And now? That I only have Karen? And she's going to give up right now? How lucky I am right?

"You shouldn't be like these Ma'am.. You should always look beautiful.. You should always look smart and kind in front of us. Not these Ma'am that you looked really stressed and careless of yourself at the same time." Karen told me like I'm her daughter and she's my Mom.

She lift up my chin as she wipe the tears I waste to the boy who's already getting married to Jaeyeon. Karen put my hair in the back of my ear as she wipe again my face with her hanky.

"S-sorry.." I apologized and wipe my tears.

I know I looked crazy. I'm always like these. Everyday. Every night. Crying in the side of the bathroom of my office when I'm receiving a letter from Jaeyeon..

She's been doing this since last month. Sending me a letter with a picture of her, pregnant. She told in the letter that she's already 9 months pregnant so anytime, she'll be give a birth on her baby. Sometimes she's with Taehyung while touching her big tummy and saying that they'll be married on next month.

Is that means that.. Since were fighting.. She's already pregnant with Taehyung?

How I dreamt that if I was Jaeyeon and I'm with Taehyung.. How will be happy is us?

I cried harder in my thoughts as I almost killed myself from gripping my hair and hurting myself physically.

The feeling is mutual.

Nothing changes.

No one changes.

I still love him.

•••T O B E C O N T I N U E D•••

I'm crying while typing this. ㅠㅠ

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