17. Reminisce

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You found yourself waking up again

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You found yourself waking up again.  As of late, you felt like you found yourself waking up and being reborn, more and more now.

You stared at the skies of your room laying weakly. The room was dark.  No light peered from outside as it was pitch black.  Your eyes shifted all over the room trying to understand, or remember at least. 

Your hand trembled slowly moving up towards your cheek.  Your head filled with memories of the wetness on your face as blood oozed out your gut.

"Please...I can't...I can't live like this, anymore."

I should be dead. I was dying. So why am I alive?

You slowly sat up finding it more difficult to do. 

You pulled yourself up, moving back into the bed frame grunting as you moved.  You rested against it taking a deep breath feeling oddly weighed and a sting from the left side of your body.

Through the sheets you saw something bulking out from your left leg.  You rested your hand on the covers over your leg.  You yanked it off quickly.  Your eyes widened as a large cast encasing your entire foot leading all the way up, just below your knee was revealed to you.

A cast?  I should be healing right?  

The sound of the stake impaling your calf echoed in your mind.  It was gruesome cracking of your bone.  Even though it was devastating, you couldn't believe they put a cast on you.

You frowned at your left leg.  You slightly shifted to the right side of the bed, placing your right foot onto the ground. You then dragged your left leg onto the ground.  You found yourself slightly grunting in pain as your leg fell off the bed.

Well, now the hard part's done. Now just figuring out what's going on.

You slowly moved your way to the exit of the room.  Slightly trembling, you leaned onto the wall resting your right shoulder onto it. 

You huffed and grunted pushing your body off the wall using your right hand for support as you moved. 

Your hand slid down the wall, And gripped the door handle. Your hand twisted to the left pulling the door out.  You gripped the door frame pulling yourself out. 

Turning your head, you found yourself coming face to face with Taehyung who awaited outside your room.

You immediately turned away feeling your face burn up.  You started to process the issues that still lingered between you two.

You both stood in silence, waiting for either of you to make a move. You didn't expect to see Taehyung. You didn't know what to say—or if there was anything you were ready to say.

"I...I wanted to make sure you were okay when you woke up." He spoke first in his soothing tone.

He didn't want to provoke you. His intentions were only to make you feel safe.

You looked onto the ground, still clutching onto the door frame.

"Thank you. How long was I out?" You questioned. The fact that you had a cast worried you.

You felt okay, though lacking strength and the added on weight of the cast made you in a slight panic.

"It's been a quiet three days." He stated.

Your eyes widened, "I was out for three days?! What the heck had happened?!"

Life in the mansion could change at the flip of a coin. I wonder...what has happened between those two...

"Well what happened to you really hit everyone. Jin really put the blame on himself, while the others tried to return to a normal lifestyle. Everyone has been hopeful that you'd be okay so Jin hyung wouldn't freak out." Taehyung explained you you.

A part of you had slightly felt disappointed.

I guess all he could think about was Nia.  Why do I even care?  There is nothing between Jungkook and I.  I need to realize that.

Taehyung's eyes met yours once again and they lit up a bit.  "Oh also!"

"Yes..?"  You replied eyeing him.

"Jungkook, had gone into isolation himself.  Just something about him.  He wasn't like how he always was.  He was more...disappointed.  I think he was disappointed that he could protect you." He spoke in sincerity

"...he wasn't the only one.." You could hear Taehyung whisper under his breath.

You bit your lip nervously unsure of what to say, or how to reply.

"Oh.." The conversation fell flat and you quickly decided to change the attitude.

You looked up at him forcing a smile, "Well that's great.  Is Chris still alive?"  You ignored his latest statement and you could see his expression slightly fell.

"Yoongi still believes that he can lead us to your brother.  Some how some way.  So he's clinging onto his life.  Just because we can't do it, the poison will kill him soon."

"I hope." 

You took a deep breath and pushed off the door frame walking away from Taehyung.  You dragged your foot with you.

He slowly trailed behind you, wanting to aid you, help you.

"Y/n, let me help you.  You aren't even suppose to be walking with that on."  Taehyung walked towards you but you turned to him raising your hands up.

You looked him into his eyes reading him full of pain. You felt your hands slowly drop. He looked so vulnerable. You felt yourself moving closer to him.

Then you stopped. A shiver ran up your spine remembering Taehyung's eyes that day. Reminiscing the hunger Taehyung saw in you that day. 

You started to shake your head nervously, "I..I'm not ready for this Taehyung."

You slowly wrapped your arms around yourself, "I really do appreciate you trying to help and get on good terms with me.  It's just a lot has been happening, and I value our relationship too much to lie to you."

"When will you be ready? Y/n, you know I would never hurt you. Even if this, who I am. No matter how matter how blood makes me crazy, I would kill myself first before I'd ever hurt you." Taehyung spoke with passion and frustration.

You tightened your grasp around yourself, "Maybe it didn't seem like a big deal to you, but to me it really hurt for it to just come for you. Seeing your eyes full of hunger for me, it really spooked me."

You lingered a bit thinking about your next words.

"When I'm ready to talk, I want to be able to mend us completely.   Not half-ass heartedly." 

His eyes wandered a bit.  Your words caused him sorrow yet a great understanding.

"I'm sorry.  I promise it's not forever."

"I will give you your time.  I value our friendship a lot as well Y/n.  But I would be lying if I didn't say that I was hurt."  He slowly turned around and walked in the opposite direction.

You sighed and turned around walking through the halls once again.  You dragged your leg along with you wincing in pain with every movement. 

Taehyung explained you you that they had to keep Chris alive, but inside of you, your aggressive half wanted him dead.

The more you moved, the sound of voices grew louder. It was behind the two large doors to the meeting room.

You pushed through them and everyone went silent hearing you walk in. Everyone gathered but Taehyung.  Even Nia was there.

You looked around confused and they all looked at you in shock.

"What the hell is this?"

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