Gionni sat in his office, watching the clouds run past him as he tried to distract himself from the negative feelings fogging his mind. He was waiting for Nadira to arrive from her final wedding dress fitting so they could go.
He wanted to make this as quick and painless as possible for himself but he had a feeling he'd just be hurting more at the end.
He was finally meeting with his mother today, a month before his wedding day. All the preparations were complete. They had secured their photographer and videographer just three days ago and as of today, Nadira's dress was done. Gionni had some preparations of his own that were also coming to a close, and they were growing more excited by the day.
On November 1st, they'd officially become Mr. And Mrs. Cartier.
As Gionni was getting ready to call Nadira to make sure she was okay, she entered his office with a bright smile on her face, lifting his spirits a bit.
"Hey baby!" she sang happily, making her way to his desk, leaning over it and kissing him.
"Hey, mama. You look real happy, I assume everything went well with Mona?" he asked, as she took a seat across from him.
"Babe, it's gorgeous, I cried when I put it on," she pouted, making him genuinely laugh.
"I can't wait to see you in it, baby," he smiled.
"And I can't wait to see you in that tux, my Lord," she fanned herself, remembering how good he looked on the day of Ray and Xavier's wedding. "Anyway, you ready to go?" He sighed deeply and she was instantly concerned.
"What's wrong?" she asked, sitting straight up in the seat and leaning on the desk.
"I...I'm scared man. I know this not gon' go the way I want it because I know part of me don't wanna hear shit she gotta say. Tink and Gio don't either, we just doing this so we can try and move on with our lives but what if I can't?" he breathed out. "What if it just makes everything worse and I'm stuck?"
"Babe, you're letting the negative thoughts make you forget why you're doing this. Remember what you told me when we talked about it? You just wanna know why she left you, you wanna know for you. That guilt has been eating away at you for twenty something years and it's time to let that go for you," she spoke. "It may make you sad at first or it may piss you off but you're doing this for yourself. Eventually, you're gonna feel that weight drop off you. The grief of losing your mom is going to stick with you, trauma doesn't just disappear, but the emotions that came along with it are something you can tackle," she reached over and grabbed one of his hands in hers.
"And no matter what happens when you come out of there, you won't go though it alone. Your brother and sister will be there for you and you already know I will. If any point you wanna go, we can go okay?" he nodded his head, watching as she pressed a kiss to his hand.