𝐏 𝐫 𝐨 𝐬 𝐞 𝐜 𝐮 𝐭 𝐢 𝐨 𝐧 | 𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐀𝐌𝐁𝐖

Restoration

Jungkook heard a faint noise from where he lie in Joy's bed. His eyes fluttered, and he wiped the blurriness from them, recognizing the absence of the other weight in bed. The realization woke him up more, and he lifts his head to see that Joy wasn't lying next to him. He was unsure how he hadn't noticed, because he was certain they'd fallen asleep while he was holding her.

He heard that noise again, and it was more noticeable now that he was alert. Jungkook turns his head groggily in the direction it came from, sitting up and massaging the soreness from his neck. The bathroom door was closed, but the soft beam of light spilled through the crevices.

He didn't hear anything, and he waited a moment in hopes that she'd come back, however that never happened, and that shuffling noise was making him anxious. Jungkook got up from bed before he could think of the worst case scenarios. He didn't want to get paranoid over something that was probably unlikely to happen.

Quietly, Jungkook approached the door, trying to listen for anything. He realized that there was a small crack left in it, and he gently pushed the door open with his hand. He looked in, immediately spotting his girlfriend. She was sat on the closed toilet seat, hugging herself, her leg was bouncing - likely the source of the shuffling that woke him - her eyes were out of focus, like she was deep in thought.

Her gaze was rested on the floor, and there was a frown etched onto her face. He took a step forward, and she blinked, finally noticing his presence. She jumped slightly, looking up at him blankly. Jungkook hadn't missed how faint she looked now that she was facing him.

She cleared her throat, "Hey, what are you doing out of bed?" She was trying to play it off as though something was never wrong, but Jungkook knew better. Even through his exhaustion he could see.

Jungkook scoffs to himself, watching as she shifted and made an effort to stop her anxious mannerisms, to no avail. He approached nearer, "I should be asking you the same thing," she couldn't meet his eyes, which was never a good sign with Joy. "Are you okay?"

Joy bobbed her head, though Jungkook knew how much that wasn't true. She was tense, and he didn't like her being tense or dwelling on the bad things. She's been doing that a lot lately, letting her mind wander to the worst of places. It was like Ellen revived an insecurity she'd always had and it kept re-surfacing. He squats before her, grabbing her soft hand in his.

She looked down, knowing Jungkook was trying to see her face. Despite her efforts to hide her expression he could very clearly see that she was stressed again. They really had to put a stop to this. It was starting to affect her health and Jungkook feared it would get worse. But she kept bottling it up inside, and Jungkook didn't want her to reach a point of no return. He tries to coax some truth out of her, " What's wrong?"

"It's... it's really nothing. It'll blow over and I'd rather not talk about it. I just want to let it go." Her voice wavered and trembled, and Jungkook was certain that it wasn't just because she was tired - which had to have been true. He was at a loss on what to do, now. The past few weeks he's spent with her, he was trying his best to lift her spirits, and vice versa. No matter how much they try to focus on something else it seems those demons always come dragging her back. They take one step forward and two steps back.

He had an unfaltering gaze on her face as he reads her, gently he massaged the back of her hand. "Is this about work?" He assumed. If it was about that little asshole Ted from her job he was going to handle things himself, and there would be nothing anyone could do to stop him. As a matter of fact, Joy hasn't been talking about work so much as she used to in the recent months, and especially not about that perverted little weasel that's her co-worker.

Despite his assumptions, Joy seemed unsure herself. "Sure... no.... it's a lot of things getting to me I-I just need time..." she sinks her face into her free hand, Jungkook's observant silence making her feel more heated. She'd sniffle, "This is so embarrassing..."

"Joy, you know you can tell me what you're thinking. I won't judge you." He assured her. She sighed heavily, her eyes were wet and she looked frustrated, but not necessarily with him.

"I know, and that's what I love about you, Kookie. But I can barely comprehend it myself... I honestly don't know what's wrong with me," Jungkook's heart sunk, and he felt it aching in his chest at the sound of her hopelessness. "I don't know why I keep getting so worked up over the most trivial things. Things I know shouldn't affect me."

Jungkook is quiet as he processes the confession. She kept forgetting that she was human, that she was allowed to feel bad sometimes and that you don't always need a reason. He supposed they were both like that, but that gave all the more reason for them to support one another. He was obligated to reduce her stress, to at least know what it is she was- they were dealing with. He tries to appoint a label on her turmoil, to classify and assess it as needed.

"What happened at the restaurant? Is that what this is about?"

She was quiet for a moment, yet another deep sigh making her chest drop, and when it did she remained deflated. Her shoulders were still slumped and his diagnosis seemed to weigh them down further. He squeezes her hand reassuringly. "Baby, that stuff doesn't matter-"

"But he's not the first person to tell me this, Kookie," she explains, sounding defeated. "I know they don't matter b-but I can't stop thinking about what they said." Her chin quivered slightly and she clenched her jaw to stop it. She had a clear reluctance to show how weak this was making her feel. Joy hadn't felt this inferior in a long time, not since she was in high school.

"Baby-" he started.

"I know..." She knew that she shouldn't be thinking or feeling such things. But goddammit she couldn't help it. She forced a lump past her throat, her voice thick. "I know it's not true but I can't help starting to believe what they're saying. I don't know what to do with myself, Kookie, because it's not fair to you."

She was clearly on the verge of another meltdown, and Jungkook couldn't bear to see that again. It hurt him too much to see her feel so awful. He's quick to try to calm her down, "Joy, take a breath, baby. Please, you're making me worried."

She nodded quickly, "I'm sorry-" He was unsure why she always felt the need to apologize to him. He felt the need to share his own thoughts with her, hopefully they could share the burden she was bearing together because it wasn't right for her to do it on her own. That's what he was there for.

"Don't be so hard on yourself. I hate to say it, but I have those thoughts too." He admitted, surely they weren't to the same extreme as her thoughts, but he spoke the truth.

"Really?" Oddly, she sounded hopeful. Almost as though she was glad she wasn't the only one. Jungkook felt a twinge in his chest at her soft tone.

He nods, sure of his response, "I'm sure it's natural for us to think that." Of course it was, their relationship was controversial in nearly every sense of the matter to both of their demographics.

She was listening closely, clinging to his words with a desperation that he hadn't seen before. Her head bobs slowly as she dwells on it, and Jungkook heard her sniffle, "You're the only man I've felt this much for. I really can't explain it, no matter how hard I try. But with these thoughts in mind..."

She covers her flushing face with her hand, she was trying to hide her misery but Jungkook still heard her labored breaths. Her heart was pumping so hard that it literally shook her chest with each palpitation. She had an overwhelming amount of love for him and she needed to focus on it. She had to.

A quiet sob shakes her body, she was sinking and Jungkook could barely catch her. She was crying discreetly, and Jungkook felt awful. "Jungkook," her frail whisper shook his core. "I'm scared."

It was the confession he wanted and yet still he hadn't been prepared for it. He leans up and engulfs her in his arms, sighing as he squeezes her tightly. He didn't want her to cry. He hated when she cries, it always breaks his heart. He wished that others wouldn't be so adamant about giving their input, polluting their minds with awful thoughts. They wanted a strong relationship, and they would be resilient.

Jungkook would make sure of it.