Chapter Twenty-Three: Melancholy

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Chapter Twenty-Three: Melancholy

There's a burning sensation on my skin that I can't get rid of. I scratch, and scratch, but no matter how much I try to ease the sting, it only causes further irritation. It's as if I've been thrown into a fire, allowing my body to scorch into flames and bubble up into nothingness. How do you ease the anguish?

Just Jump. To ease a burn, soak it in water. My body is one big wound in need of freezing cold liquid to take the suffering away. I let my head face down into the water and open my eyes. It's murky and the ripples of splashing waters make it hard to see what's beneath me. I can't breathe anymore, and yet it calms me. Water takes over, my skin, my hair, my mouth, my lungs. It makes its way all through me, becoming me, and I can finally feel sedated, free.

The taste of cigarette smoke pooling down my throat was always relaxing. It was as if the feeling of suffocation soothed me. I continued to puff on it, while staring out into the distance. The view of various buildings and the night sky was tame and still. The cars at the bottom looked to be the size of ants, each headlight lighting the ground in a yellow glow.

I was damn cold, but I didn't care. It was a new year, and I wasn't off to the best start. Should this be the year that I make a resolution that I'd come to break within a week? A day even?

I want her to be with me.

"E?" A small voice called from behind me, followed by the sound of the large, iron door closing.

I didn't say anything, I didn't have to.

"I thought you might be up here," She said, standing beside me now, at the rails of the edge of the roof.

"How'd you know I was here?" I said and puffed on my smoke.

She took the cigarette out of my hands and took a drag herself. "I saw you inside."

I glanced at her momentarily before looking back at the night sky. I took the stolen bottle out of the pocket of my suit jacket and removed the jacket, placing it over her bare shoulders.

"Why didn't you stay?" She asked, confused. A shiver in her throat.

"Not my scene."

She covered herself securely in the jacket, an attempt to keep warm.

"You should go inside, Lacey." I said, low.

"I don't want to right now." She defended and flicked the cigarette to the ground. "Something is bothering you."

I remained quiet, but sipped on the rum.

"Your lip seems to have taken a beating," She commented. "There's still a bit of blood on your knuckles. Is that why you were so late?"

"Don't worry, Lace."

She smiled, small. "I'm not worried about that."

"Is Tyler mad I ditched?" I asked, feeling ashamed. I most likely let him down tonight.

"He didn't see you. And he wished you came, we all did. But he isn't mad. He's too preoccupied.."

"You all did?" I asked, turning in her direction slightly. I leaned my elbow on the top of the slicked rail.

"Mhm," She nodded. "Aria was waiting for you, you know."

I frowned and took another swig. "Is that right?" I said, sarcastic. "I'm sure she was doing fine without me there."

"That's not true, Eli. She wanted you there. I don't understand why you left." She frowned, voice suppressing a whine.

I laughed. "Look at me, Lace. I'm not the most put together guy."

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