Disco. Christopher Pike - Longing Part 2

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Several months has passed since you and Chris broke it off. It hadn't gotten easier, though you had gotten better at dealing with it. You managed to work in the same room as him without wanting to cry or throw yourself into his arms. And, you were sleeping better. For the first little while you had had trouble falling asleep without him in the bed next to you. You two hadn't been living together, though you had spent several nights w week either in his quarters or yours. Now, you fell asleep with a dull ache in your heart and an empty spot in your bed.

You finished your nighttime routine and were about to climb into bed when your door chime went off.

"Come in," you called out, not even bothering to grab something to cover your sleepwear.

The door opened and Chris stepped inside, an unreadable expression on his face. The door shut behind you and you were overly aware of the tension filling the room.

"Captain," you said, surprised.

"Y/N," he greeted, meeting your gaze for only a moment before looking away. "I was wondering if we could talk?"

Your heartrate quickened. You nodded slightly. "What about?"

Chris rubbed the back of his neck and begun to pace. "I know it's been a rough couple of months for the both of us. And talking to me like this is probably pretty hard."

"You could say that," you mused. You took a few steps closer, though made sure to keep your distance.

"Y/N, I'm sorry. I love you, and I never should have ended what we had."

Your eyes widened. Did he really just say that? You had imagined him saying something along those lines every day for the past few months, but you never thought it would actually happen.

"I... I love you, too," you said after a moment of silence.

You two locked eyes. Chris' were full of guilt.

"I realize now that I can't possibly be a good captain if I'm miserable. How can I lead people if I can barely focus? How can I expect people to follow my orders when I'm walking around like an empty shell?"

You didn't know what to say, so you simply shook your head.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry," he said, nearly pleading. "I want us to be together again. I need you."

"Chris..." Your mouth stayed open, but no words left. You didn't know how to express your thoughts. Everything you had been feeling and wanting to say for the past few months seemed as though they couldn't be brought to words. You hoped that all of the emotions etched on your face would tell Chris enough to know what you were thinking.

Chris took your hands in his.

You instinctively squeezed his. "I love you," you mumbled. "I've missed you so much."

"I've missed you, too. I don't care what the other members of the crew think. I love you, and I want to be with you. So what if you're under my command?"

"What about Starfleet?" you asked. "I know there's no rule, but they won't exactly be too thrilled to find out."

He shook his head. "I'll deal with that when the time comes. But what are they going to do? Suggest we break up? They can't order us to do anything about our personal lives. I made a mistake, and I regret it more than anything else. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you and I'm sorry for thinking I had to be alone in order to make a good captain. I love you so much. Y/N, please, will you take me back?"

You let go of his hands and for a brief moment sadness washed over his face. Then, you wrapped your arms around his neck and you knew he was smiling then. His arms went around your waist, holding you close. And just like that, everything was right with the world. You felt whole again.

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