Chapter 25

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When the guys returned to the dorm, they found you outside on the patio, looking out at the city. You were so deep in thought you never heard them approach. Since the gentleman left, you had done a lot of thinking. Yes, you had worked hard to get where you wanted to be. Yes, you looked good. But honestly, 2 pounds? You are holding out for 2 pounds before you're happy? Most likely, the closer you get to 115, if you get there, the more you will panic, but for now, enjoy the fact that you've come so far and look and feel amazing.

But why do you feel the way you do about all of it? Why is this such a struggle for you? Why the need for perfection? Why do you feel like you're not enough? These are all important questions you need answered in order to move forward and stop struggling so damn much. You think you have an idea, but it wouldn't be easy, or fun. It's going to be painful and it's going to be raw, but maybe it was time to get raw. Maybe it was time for you to stop running away and start facing these truths. And the only way you could do that is to go home. Korea didn't hold the answers for you. You needed to go back and find them at home.

"Y/N?" Jimin quietly said, walking up to you and wrapping you in a back hug. He put his cheek on your head and closed his eyes, inhaling deeply. You closed your eyes as well and smiled. You loved his hugs, back and front. He just seemed to envelope you and hold you as close as he could. You felt safe. You felt loved. You felt protected.

Opening your eyes, you turned around and wrapped your arms around his neck and placed a kiss on his plump lips. "Hey."

"Hey," he answered back. He looked down at you and smiled. "Everything ok?" You nodded your head, and then kissed him again before movement behind him caught your eye. It was only then you realized you weren't alone.

"Hi guys," you greeted, breaking away from Jimin's hold. They walked over to you tentatively. "Look, I want to apologize to you all." You stood in front of them all, making sure to make eye contact with each one as you spoke. "I know you guys all meant well when you did the intervention. I know you only asked the medical staff to come by because you care."

"We do, Y/N. We all care," Taehyung said.

"I never should have had that outburst and I never should have been angry with you."

"We understand," Namjoon said. "When you're in that deep you don't see it. Even when others around you do. We're sorry if we hurt you."

"You didn't hurt me." You replied. Then rolled your eyes at yourself. "Ok, maybe you did at first, but now I get it. I get why you did it and there are some things I need to sort out. I know I have another 2 days here, but I can't work on the things I need to from Korea." You looked directly at Jimin. "I have to go home."

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*Jimin's POV*

Seeing her standing at the edge of the patio made you nervous and scared and sad. You didn't like to see her that way. You wanted to protect her from whatever demons held her captive. You'd had plenty to deal with – and were still dealing with – and you didn't want anyone else to go through it too. She appeared vulnerable and you wanted to hold her close.

Which is why you walked up to her and hugged her tightly. You wanted to feel her body close to yours so you knew, at least for the moment, she was ok. That she was real. That she was safe. When she turned around to face you and kiss you, she appeared as if a weight had at least shifted slightly and she seemed a little lighter. This made you happy. Obviously the talk with the medical staff was a good thing.

But when she said she needed to go home....that nearly broke you.

"Home?" You asked, your voice almost cracking. She nodded and took your hand.

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