chapter 25

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I hadn't seen Tristan after he got me soup. I knew he was in the house but I was feeling skittish and wanted some time away from those grey orbs of his. Something about what he had said about how he hoped one day I'd remember what happened.

After a couple of days, I felt much better and finally ventured out into the office and carried out my routines. Tristan and I made some contact but not long enough to hang out in the living room.

I was eating a banana while checking my mail when a thump came from his room. Ignoring it, I flipped through the pictures from my new shoot when I heard the thump again. Now, I was curious.

 The thumping sound didn't cease to stop, so I approached the door slowly. Placing my ear against the door, I silently prayed that I didn't hear explicit noises. I heard loud breathing and panting? Oh god, I was actually afraid to open the door.

Closing my eyes and counting to three, I swung the door open. All I found was a golden retriever puppy in a cage playing with its toy and attempting to also get out from the cage. It was possibly the cutest thing ever. 

"Hello, baby.. who's a good boy. Who's a cute lil puppy hmm?" I cooed to him through the cage.

"Oh, I wish you'd talk to me that way." the deep voice echoed through the room. Because I was crouching on the floor and he surprised me, I ended up falling on my ass. He was casually leaning against the door frame. He must have been to the gym cause he was all sweaty and sexy. 

"You didn't ask me permission if you could bring a dog." I pretended to be appalled as I took the precious ham out of its cage. 

"I just figured you could have some company when I'm not around. He's friendly but I'm sure he can be mean to anyone who wants to hurt you." he smiled making me all warm on the inside.

"Just make sure I don't have to clean his poopy up." I huffed and exited the room. With the dog.

"Don't worry princess!" he said laughing. I could feel his searing gaze scanning my butt.

I played with the precious pupper for a while and realized he had no name yet and that would be a task for Tristan to come up with.

I got ready for work and when I got off the elevator and stepped into the hallway, everyone seemed to stop what they were doing. I heard small bits of their conversations. "Married" "Hot ass husband" "Slut" etc etc.

Typical of people to be that way. I shut my door with too much force due to my annoyance and I took off my blazer. My door creaked open and in stepped Logan. Just great. Because I really needed another reason for people to talk.

My emotions were all over the place. I thought I had feelings for Tristan but when Logan comes near me it rattles me. How is that even possible. Thinking about it was giving me a minor migraine.

"Hey, you're back. I tried to come to see you but your Italian bulldog wouldn't let me in." he sat on the chair opposite mine.

"Really? He didn't mention anything to me." I was at a lost on how to feel. He used me for money. But here he is telling me he wanted to see me when I was sick. Did he really care or not? 

"Of course he didn't. He actually likes you Tati." he said somberly.

WHAT?! The thought of Tristan actually liking was rather pleasant. He sure looked like he knew how to romance a woman.

"What about you Logan? Why pretend to act like you care about me when you don't? You clearly are using me for money." I was starting to get emotional right now and I was pretty sure I would cry.

It was like I sort of didn't care that he kept hurting me. I just wanted his attention.

"I hadn't realized he had come next to me and he pulled me up from my chair. His arms went around my waist and he said "I think I might like you Tati." those words made my heart swell with joy and heartache. He wasn't sure. He kissed me and just as things were getting heated, the door opened again and Tristan saw us.

His eyes flashed with anger and he slammed the door out.

"I guess he knows now." Logan smiled at me. Like he had just won something. 

There was always that constant struggle within myself cause I never knew what to do. Being a fat kid most of my life had a serious impact on me. After all, I never had a boyfriend. How the hell was I supposed to know what to do?

I didn't bother chasing after Tristan cause I know he'd probably just ignore me. Deciding to let him blow off some steam I finished up my work and only returned home after I was done. When I got home, the little puppy ran to me. It already had a collar on with the name Zeus engraved on it.

"Where's your gorgeous master hmm?" just as I said that his room door opened and he had just showered. 

"So, you sucked face with Logan." his eyes which usually showed his emotions were blank. They showed no sign of life.

"Don't start with me Tristan. I don't know what we are. I don't know if you even like me for real or you're just as big as a douche as Logan is. I don't know if I like you or Logan. I just don't know ok?!" I yelled and carried Zeus up to my room with me. Yes, I slammed the door again.

I pretty much stayed in my room just lazing on my bed, watching tv, then Zeus starting barking. He hadn't peed or anything so I had to show my face downstairs. 

It was close to 11 and Zeus was getting more and antsier so I HAD to take him out. 

Snagging Zeus's leash I passed the living room and he was there. Surprisingly, he was there alone and was doing work.

He raised his head up and his lips formed a thin line.

"Where are you going at this hour?" annoyed grouchy tone was all I got.

"Your mutt needs to pee and poop.'

"I'll come with you. Don't even bother arguing with me." he grabbed his sweater and we went to the elevator. When we crossed the lobby and reached outside, we fell into step. Zeus did not act like a wild dog or anything.

"Don't pretend you hate Zeus. You know you love him." he broke the silence.

"Yea.. yea I do." I smiled.

"Let me show you something." he took hold of Zeus's leash and unhooked it. Instead of fleeing, he kept walking next to us. At the park, all Tristan had to say was go pee and he did exactly that. We let him roam around for a while and we sat on the bench.

Admiring the tall New York City buildings around us and their lights.

"Do you really like him though?" he asked.

I knew what he meant exactly. If I liked Logan.

"I'm not sure. I just want to be able to love myself and give myself the best. I don't know if should take a chance on him. I don't know.."I bit my tongue about saying what I thought about us.

"Whatever you choose, I'll help you out." 

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