My Love, My Saviour, My Student •Shawn Mendes

44.

Faye Dawson
I had been debating in my head all morning. Shawn and I had spent the last few days at his house just relaxing. But when I found a family photo at the back of one of his drawers I wasn't as relaxed.
Shawn never spoke of his family and it made me curious as to why he was so secretive of them.
"You're being quiet today" Shawn said before kissing my head and sitting on the window seat, a drink in his hand.
"I want to meet your family" I blurted out and Shawn coughed, choking on his drink.
"What?!"
"I would really like to meet your family. We've been dating a good while now and I've never met them or more importantly they've never met me" I explained but it affected Shawn more than I thought it would.
"No fucking way. No" he said shaking his head with a sarcastic smile.
"Why not?"
"Don't you wonder why I don't speak of them? Don't you wonder why they're never here?" He said walking into the kitchen, me hot on his tail.
"Yes. Yes I do but I don't pry into it because I guessed it was a tense subject but now I think I need to know Shawn" I said trying not to raise my voice at him.

Shawn stood running his hands through his hair, his eyes gently closed.
I was cautious as I moved towards him.
"Shawn" I said reaching my hand to touch his arm but quickly, he grabbed my wrist harshly.
"Just because your family is perfect doesn't mean mine is!" He yelled.
"You think my family is perfect?! I don't have a father for Christ's sake!"
"Probably left because you're a brat" Shawn spat and before he even finished I reached my hand back and slapped his cheek as hard as I could.
His eyes looked at me with a sobering rage and he pushed me backwards so the bottom of my back hit the counter.
"How dare you" I whispered, tears in my eyes.
"Wait Faye I'm sorry I just"
"Save it. I don't want anything to do with you right now" I said as my heart broke into two.

This was too much to handle. We had had too many arguments and im sure it wasn't healthy. But I love him so much.
I ran up to Shawn's bedroom balcony and sat on one of the two chairs out there.
Before long I heard the door slide open and Shawn sat on the other chair.
"My dad, he left me and Mum to survive on our own. No money no nothing. It seemed as if he didn't love us anymore. About or three four years ago we got a call. He'd been driving whilst drunk after being out with a woman and he crashed. Died instantly they said. And I never got to say goodbye or ask why he left." I said staring into space. "I haven't seen his side of the family since the funeral"  
Shawn sighed and got up out of his chair kneeling down infront of me.
"I'm so sorry. Faye. I didn't mean it I was shocked that my family came up. I'm so sorry" he said with tears in his own eyes.

" where did you go the other night?" I asked through tears. "Because I know you weren't with Andrew." I could see a panicked look in Shawn's eyes.
He really thought I wouldn't find out.
"What are you talking about?"
"You said you were going out with Andrew. However Andrew rung me saying he couldn't get hold of you. You forget we're friends Shawn."
"Fuck. Faye I'm so sorry ok. I'm so sorry. I went out with Camila,"
"Did you kiss?" I asked dreading the answer. Shawn nodded slowly and again my heart tore.

"It's too much Shawn. All of this. It's too much. My heart is breaking more and more and I don't want that" I told him wiping away my tears. "I love you so much and I try and forgive but it's becoming so hard to do that"
"Faye I know I've probably said I'm sorry so many times but I can't have you leave me. And I'm so sorry for all I've done to hurt you. Truly I am. I'll do anything to keep you. Anything. I can't do this without you" Shawn cried and I lifted my gaze upwards.
"I really want to meet your family Shawn" I said holding his chin and lifting his head.
"Faye,"
"Please? I think it will be good for us" I asked softly and Shawn closed his eyes and sighed before nodding his head.
"Fine I'll book plane tickets. But don't be surprised if we turn up and they slam the door in my face"
"Why would they? They're your family" I said putting a hand on his arm.
"I just caused them trouble. A lot of trouble and when the whole stealing work scandal came out they said they wanted nothing to do with me" Shawn explain obviously upset by it all.
"I'm sorry Shawn, but maybe it's time to re connect. I'll help you" I said holding his hand. He nodded again looking up at me with a small smile.

"I think I'm going to go home" I said to Shawn picking up my overnight gym bag.
"Is it because of me?"
"No no. I just need to tell Mum about everything and if we're going to visit your parents then I need to tell her" I said and Shawn nodded taking my bag to the door for me.
"Do you want me to walk you home?"
"No I'll be ok thank you" I smiled kissing his lips lightly.
"I'll let you know when I can get the tickets to Toronto"
"Toronto? You're from there?" I asked and he nodded. "I never knew that"
Shawn laughed giving me a hug and I hugged him back before leaving his house and returning to my own.

Little did I know I would get a pretty big shock as I opened the door.

"Er Mum?" I said with wide eyes as I saw my Mum looking very cosy with a man I recognised as Mark from her work. "Mark" I said picking up little Shawn and stroking her.
"Good to see you again Faye" Mark said and I nodded.
Mark had been coming round more often for dinners or taking Mum out. I'm not stupid I knew they had been seeing each other. For a good two years now.
"You too Mark. Mum I'm going to Canada with Shawn" I sprung on her and she looked very taken back.
"Erm when? How? Why?" She said and and Mark contributed with a laugh.
"To meet his parents. He's trying to get tickets as soon as possible" I said and she sighed.
"You're growing up so quick. Going on all these adventures" Mum laughed and I shrugged.
"It'll be good for me and Shawn" I said heading up the stairs.
"Oh Er honey? Is it ok with you if Mark stays here for a while?" Mum asked and I scrunched my eyebrows.
"Sure. As long as I can't hear you at night" I laughed.
"Faye!" Mum screamed but before she could say more I ran upstairs with Shawn still in my arms.

I was happy for Mum. It was good for her to be properly moving on after dad. I just hoped that the trip to see Shawn's family went fine and no tears would be shed.