She was different to any student he had ever come across. She was quiet, read books, didn't party, but behind the silence was a sadness that radiated from her. It was as if he couldn't help himself, he wanted to be what she needed. The only problem...
Shawn Mendes I was going to show her. I was going to show her how much I really wanted this. How much I really wanted her. I had already cooked for her at my house and every day I think my heart would race a little faster whenever I saw her. She seemed happier now which made me happier. She smiled more, which made me smile more. She's all I wanted, illegal or not. "Hey you" She said walking into my room shutting the door behind her. Every lunch she would come up here and spend it with me. I stood up and walked over to her, quickly pushing my lips onto hers. "Shawn!" She whisper yelled pulling away. "We're at school! Someone could see!" She panicked and I held her small hand in mine. "Ok I'm sorry I just could help myself" I laughed and Faye rolled her eyes. "So" "So" "Do you want to go out this evening?" I asked her and on seeing her nod I smiled. "If it's ok with you we'll go straight after school and you can stay over?" "Sounds good to me" she smiled and walked back towards me. She stood a foot away from me and I could see she was about to reach up to my face when the door was thrown open.
We jumped back from each other and looked at who had come in. It was another girl from Faye's year. "I knew it!" She smirked strutting in and my heart started to race. Fuck. "Cara what the fuck are you on about?" Faye said and I knew she was probably panicking as well. This girl couldn't know anything. She couldn't. We had kept it so quiet and non public. But no matter how much I tried there was still a bit of me that knew she knew. I could loose my job. I could be arrested. I could loose Faye. And all because of this one girl. Cara, looked between us and smirked more. "You're giving her extra help before finals and no one else" she folded her arms and I felt the biggest weight be lifted from my shoulders. She didn't know. I looked at Faye and she kept a harsh gaze on this girl. "I think it's unfair. I've noticed you coming into his room for the past week now and finals are next week. At first I thought you were sucking his dick or something but then I thought, no man would ever want you in that way" Cara spat and I could see Faye's knuckles turn white as she clenched her fist. I couldn't blame her. I was absolutely furious. "Get to the headmaster. Now" I spat back at the girl and suddenly she looked worried. "W-what?" "You heard me. Go. Now!" I raised my voice and she hurried out of the room not looking so brave.
Neither me nor Faye said anything for a few moments. That was until I saw her run her hands through her hair and slump down against the wall. I sat down on top of my desk and kept my gaze on her. A few tears fell down her face and it broke my heart a little to see. "I want to be with you Shawn so badly. But it's never going to be easy. There's always going to be something and someone getting in the way" she cried and all the time I never looked away from her crying figure. "Come here" I said simply, holding out my arms to her. Faye rose and walked slowly into my arms. She sat beside me and I kept one arm around her shoulders. "I told you I would try hard to show you I want you. I want this. And I like to think I am. Just because one girl made a rude comment doesn't mean I'm going to stop trying." She smiled and nodded tilting her head to give me a kiss on my tense jaw. "Right, Im going to make sure that girl gets a suspension and I will see you sixth period" I said kissing her hand and briskly leaving the room.
"Ah Mr Mendes come in" Alan said. I walked into the grand office and saw Cara sat infront of him. "So what's gone on?" I stared down at the girl who looked like she was close to tears as she retold what just happened in my room. As she went along I had to correct her as to what she exactly said as she tried to hide it. "I consider myself a reasonable teacher but that was just plain rude and very inappropriate" I said to the headmaster who's face turned redder as the story went on. "I agree with you Mr Mendes with both statements. It was very inappropriate which is why I'm going to give you, Cara, a three day suspension starting on Monday" he said and I was pleased. I nodded as Cara left the room with her suspension form. "I'm very pleased with the work you've done this year Shawn. Many students are really connecting with your teaching especially, Miss Dawson" Alan said and I nodded. "She's a very capable student and has asked me for extra help to get her into the best university. I want to give her the best" I sighed and he looked pleased with my response. "That's very good of you." Alan smiled and I left the room ready to start teaching.
I scrunched my nose up as Faye smiled at me from her seat at the front. "Ok so you all wrote a short essay about romance for your homework and instead of me spending hours of my time marking them, you're all going to read them out" I said and earned groans from the class. After listening to 17 different essays and the most of them being mediocre at best, I was just looking forward to hearing the last one, Faye's. "Miss Dawson, if you would" I smiled and she sat up more in her seat. She took a deep breath and began with her words. "Love. It's a word that's thrown around more than it probably should be. People say it without meaning it and are happy with that. But why? Why do we get ourselves involved with that word if we don't truly feel it? Today, We're lucky if we feel love. Nothing is simple. No matter how much you want someone, no matter how badly, there's always something that gets in the way." She looked up at me and I knew she was talking about me, about us. "Within myself I think there's a part of me that's scared of being in love. And it's why I don't tell him. I don't tell him I love his smile and the way his hair falls. I can't tell him I love the way he makes me laugh and the way he loves me. I want to. But love, it's such s strong think I'm worried that if I fall in. I'll never be able to get back out again." Faye finished by looking up at me and I had nothing to say.
I didn't know she felt this way. How could I? She never told me. But now I know a reason. And I'm glad that her reason for not telling me is the exact same as mine.
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