red band society - 5SOS au ☣

six

"luke. its been a week and a half since we've hung out- i miss you." mikey pouts, ripping the pillow from infront of my face.

"and jesus christ get a shower or something you look like shit." he groans, falling back into the seat beside my bed.

"i'm sorry- i've just been to tired to do anything." i shrug, rubbing my eyes.

"you should see ashton though- he seriously looks dead. and he hasnt talked since his little episode in my room." michael says curiously.

"lets go get something to eat i guess." i sigh, standing up from my bed and slipping on my bunny slippers from my nurse.

"you look so manly." zoe chuckles, walking up next to me and michael with alfie by her side.

"gee thanks." i say sarcastically, shoving my fork into my mac n' cheese. 

"hey what did that mac n' cheese ever do to you?" a tired looking ashton mutters from behind me.

"are you magic or something?" calum says excitedly, grabbing me by the shoulders.

"um no?" i say curiously, raising my eyebrows at him.

"ashton spoke!" calum shrieks excitedly, picking up his grilled cheese.

"dont get to excited- you might die." ashton mumbles, poking at his food.

"ashton." michael says sternly, sending him a glare.

"michael." ashton retorts sarcastically.

"i bet you have cancer in your balls, that's probably why you're such a dick." michael chuckles dryly, standing up from his seat and grabbing his tray.

"michael!" i yell at him, standing up from my chair.

"what luke? defending the mute boy with mommy issues?" michael says angrily, staring me straight in the eyes.

"lets not stoop down to his level mikey- you're better then that." i mutter, grabbing his shoulder.

he quickly shrugs my hand off, shakes his head in dissaproval and walks away.

i turn back to see a nearly empty table. by nearly i mean there was one person left.

ashton.

"what the hell was that?" i say angrily, glaring at ashton.

he looks down at the table and shakes his head.

"you dont get it luke." ashton sighs, looking up at me.

"please- enlighten me." i say through clenched teeth.

"what brought you down here today luke?" ashton says calmly, folding his hands together.

"michael." i say curiously.

"do you consider michael a friend? a close one?" 

"yeah. i suppose so?" i shrug.

"what happens-" ashton takes a deep breath, "when you-" he takes another deep breath, "are lying down, about to die-" he sighs and looks down, "and he is there-" ashton takes another breath.

"when you die, it's not only you being put through pain- it's everyone you love." ashton says softly, a small tear falling down his face.

"that's what you dont understand ashton. they all know what's coming. knowing someone's dead and finding out someone's dead are two different things." 

 "if no one cares it wouldn't matter at all." he sighs, standing up from the table.

"i care." i say flatly.

"no you don't luke. no one does." ashton says tiredly, turning to look at me.

"im sixteen, i have leukemia, my birthday is july sixteenth, funny right, my zodiac sign is cancer, i can play guitar and i have one year to live. my parents left me here when i turned fourteen because my bills were to much to handle, i was diagnosed when i was ten and a few nights after i was diagnosed i tried to commit suicide."

"i didnt ask you to tell me about your life story luke." ashton sighs, turning to leave.

"i told you cause i trust you." i mumble, sitting down in my seat.

"you're stupid. i don't even trust myself."

☣☣☣

im not inferring all cancer patients are douchebees when they are dying so take no offense to this at all please