Crusty's Waterbed Palace

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Y/n's POV

"Los Angeles, please. Santa Monica pier," Annabeth told the driver as she ushered us all into a taxi. 

"That's three hundred miles," the cabbie counted. "For that, you gotta pay up front." 

"Here," Annabeth offered and handed him her Lotus card. "Try this."

Surprisingly, the card worked, and with that, the driver sped off. Our whole drive through the Mojave Desert, the speedometer never went below 95, but I was fine with that if it would get us to the entrance to the underworld in time. The sun was setting when we reached the Santa Monica pier, and it reminded me of Navy Pier back in Chicago. But this place smelled much worse. We walked down to the water front, and as soon as I dipped my hand into the ocean, I felt refreshed. Water always had that effect on me.

"Stay here," Percy instructed as he walked into the water. "I'll be right back."

When Percy resurfaced minutes later, he was holding 4 pearls in his hand. He told us all about his encounter with a Nereid, who had given him the pearls. After that, we dug some change out of the backpack Ares had given us and boarded a bus. Percy showed the driver the address to DOA Recording Studios, which he had taken from Aunty Em's. The driver didn't know the location, and he stared at us a little too long, so we just got off at the next stop and walked by foot. For miles we searched for the recording studio, but it was almost like it didn't exist. Finally, the sky began to get dark, and I rubbed my arms as a cold breeze blew past us.

"Hey you!" a voice shouted from an alleyway.

Without thinking, Percy stopped, and then suddenly, we were surrounded. Six, rich, white boys in expensive clothes encircled us, trapping us four in the middle of them. Instinctively, Percy whipped out his pen and uncapped it, revealing his sword. When he slashed at the nearest boy, the blade went right through him. But his shock was all we needed to buy time. I shoved aside the boy blocking the sidewalk, and the four of us took off sprinting down the street.

"There!" Annabeth directed and pointed down the block where a store was still open.

"Crusty's Waterbed Palace," Grover read from the sign.

"Come on," I urge and lead everyone inside. We ducked behind a waterbed, and seconds later, the gang ran past the store, not even sparing it a second glance. "Phew. I think we lost them."

"Lost who?" a voice boomed from behind us. I turned around to find a man with scaly skin who looked to be about 6 feet tall. He had absolutely no hair, and his eyes reminded me of a reptile, as did his smile. He was wearing a very 70's inspired outfit: a paisley button up shirt, a velvet jacket, and a handful of silver chains. "I'm Crusty."

"Sorry to barge in," Percy apologized. "We were just, um, browsing."

"You mean hiding from those no-good kids," Crusty corrected. "They hang around every night. I get a lot of people in here, thanks to them. Say, you want to look at a waterbed? This one has a million-hand massager built in."

"Million-hand massage!" Grover cheered and leaped into the bed. "Guys, this is so cool."

"For you, my dear, do me a favor and try this one over here," Crusty requested and led Annabeth over to a safari themed bed. 

"Hey!" Annabeth protested as Crusty forced her onto the bed.

Crusty snapped his fingers. "Ergo!"

At that phrase, ropes sprung from the bed and lashed at Annabeth, wrapping themselves around her arms and legs. With them on, she couldn't get up, and was forced to lie down. Grover tried to get up too, but ropes sprang from his bed as well, lashing him to the mattress.

"Let my friends go," I demand.

"Whoa. Don't worry," Crusty assured me. "I just have to make sure they fit."

"Make sure they fit? What do you mean?" Percy quizzed.

"All the beds are exactly six feet," Crusty explained. "Your friends are too short. Got to make them fit. I can't stand imperfect measurements. Ergo!" A new set of ropes then leaped out from the top and bottom of the beds, wrapping around Grover and Annabeth's ankles and armpits. The ropes started tightening, pulling them from both ends. "These are stretching jobs. Maybe eight extra centimeters on their spines. They might even live. Now why don't we find a bed you two like, huh?" 

"Guys!" Grover yelled. "Help!"

"Y/n," Percy whispered as Crusty led us around the store. "Please tell me you have a plan to get us out of here."

"I do, but its not a good one," I confess. "Um, excuse me, sir? Your real name isn't Crusty, is it?" 

"Legally, it's Procrustes," Crusty admitted. 

"The Stretcher," I recall as I remembered his story. He was the giant who'd tried to kill Theseus with over-hospitality on his way to Athens. 

"Yeah," Crusty confirmed. "But who can pronounce 'Procrustes'? It's bad for business. Now 'Crusty', it's got a good ring to it." 

"Definitely. And the workmanship on these beds? Fabulous!" I chirp.

"What are you doing?" Percy hissed. "I said we needed a plan to get us out of here. Stop complimenting the man!"

"All my customers are. Never six feet exactly," Crusty continued. "So inconsiderate. And then they complain about the fitting." 

"What do you do if they're longer than six feet?" I inquire. 

"Oh, that happens all the time. It's a simple fix," Crusty claimed and brought a huge double bladed axe out from behind the sales desk. "I just center the subject as best I can and lop off whatever hangs over on either end." 

"What a wonderful solution," I agree and stop at a waterbed. "Wow. This one looks amazing. But uh, would this one work even for a big guy like you?"

"Absolutely," Crusty replied.

"No way. Show me," I beg. Crusty sat down immediately, eager to please a customer. But by doing so, he fell right into my trap. I snapped my fingers. "Ergo!"

"Hey!" Crusty screamed as the ropes held him down. "What are you doing?"

"Center him just right," I order the ropes. At my command, the ropes readjusted themselves, and in the end, Crusty's whole head was sticking out of the top of the bed, and his feet at the bottom. I pulled my necklace off, transforming it into my sword which I twirled between my fingers.

"No! Wait!" Crusty opposed.

"Crusty, it looks like you don't fit properly," I notice. And we can't stand imperfect measurements, now can we?"

With one swing of my sword, I chopped Crusty's head clean off, and his body disappeared in a flurry of golden dust. Together, Percy and I freed our friends, who was hurting, but alive. On a bulletin board in the back, there was an advertise for DOA recording studios, with the address and a map right underneath it. Percy and I wanted to get going, but Annabeth and Grover stopped us.

"Give us a minute," Grover complained. "Annabeth and I were almost stretched to death!" 

"Then you're ready for the Underworld," Percy persisted. "It's only a block from here. Come on!"

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