Peculiarity(JeffMads/Modern AU)REVAMPING ❌

t w e n t y - t h r e e

Guess wot a Charles Lee p.o.v wot wot

  I knocked on the door of Thomas Jefferson's house. Today I was gonna tell him how I fealt. The door opened revealing a confused James Madison. I smiled. I fucking hate this guy. "Hi, may I speak to Thomas?" James sighed, a look of confliction taking over the confusion. "He's uh.." He looked me up and down "Asleep right now. Why? I can pass a message on."

  I can't just tell Thomas' best friend I have a crush on Thomas! "No it's alright. Just curious if I could have a brief conversation. I'll talk to you guys at school. Goodbye James." James nodded closing the door. I sighed and got back on my bike riding to school. "God, I'm so dumb." I mumbled to myself. Next to me a car drove up.

   The window rolled down revealing Samuel Seaburry with dark sunglasses on. "Hey Charles!" He yelled from the car. I smiled "Hi Sam!" I responded still pedaling on my bike. "Do you want a ride hot stuff?" I giggled and shook my head "Nah! I'll just bike, thanks Sammy!" Sam gave me a thumbs up before rolling the window back up and speeding off. I smiled widely. Or do I just have do I just find him attractive? Sigh feelings suck.

Thomas P.o.v.

  A knock arose to my bedroom door. "Come in." I said grogily. This might be the talk. I better brace myself. "Are you comming to school?" I shook my head.

  It had been about another week since I'd let the house. James had always brought my pop tarts or something to ensure I was eating. Other than that, I never did anything but smoke while James was gone, cry all the time and try not to sleep.

  James sighed "Well, we're out of pop tarts, I'll buy more after school, I promise." So many promises that have been given to me have been broken. If I was promised something I was breifly met with the closing of a door. I waited to hear another door close. Give it a few seconds.

  I'm running low on ciggarettes, I guess I should head to the store. I could always wait. I hate this...the nicotine isn't numbing anymore it's just a time killer at this point. If I wanted to I could stop at the snap of my fingers. I just wish James would tell me when it's getting out of hand...but...I started crying again.

Time skip

  I took a short draw off of the cigarette, staring at the view, wondering where I could go if I had to leave. Maybe I could stay with Lafayette? No, he lives with Hercules and that's James' cousin so he would have a problem with that.

  "I would stand out there with you but my asthma can't handle ciggarette smoke." James starled me, I jumped a bit. "I didn't hear you come in." I said quietly putting the cigarette out and flicking it away. James stood next to me on the back porch. "I tried to be quiet. Can we talk?" This is it. "You think I'm acting distant, you want to break up with me and you want to stay friends." I answered not making eye contact with James.

  "You've had this conversation many times I see." I shrugged "I suppose." This is the most we've talked in weeks.

  "I just think we should take a break, you just seem way more depressed about this than you should...I don't want you to stress about us so lets not be us. Let's just be-" I cut him off "our own people living our own lives?" I finished. He sighed "Why are you suddenly being so distant?" I shrugged "It felt like you broke up with me weeks ago, why should it hurt anymore now?" I asked finally making eye contact with James.

  A look of concern and worry came across James' face. I looked back off. "I just feel like you don't care about me...like that anymore." I looked at him furrowing my brow.

  "James. I have spent the past what five months loving you, the last five decades of my life fantasizing what might happen if right now I just kissed him. Then telling my self no and shaming myself for feeling that way about you." I completely turned to face him. "I don't sleep 'cause when I do all my dreams are about you. I can't stop thinking about you when I'm awake but sleep is no escape because when I sleep I dream about you, it's like this is my eternal destined hell because all I ever do it fuck up! I..not a single person on the face of the motherfucking earth would want to be with me...talk to me and you did that."

I felt tears stream down my face "Nothing in life matters to me more than you, and it took losing you to realise that. Darlin' I love you. No denying it. No matter how hard I try and I've tried I cannot get rid of this bubbly feeling I get when I talk to you, it's like a spark...a flame.." I spent a moment looking for the right word.

"A passion. I need you, I desire having you in my life and I trust nobody else in this world with my heart more than I trust you." I finished. I just poured my feelings into a glass right there. "James...I know you don't feel the same compassion towards me but...I just need you to know...I love you...and my life means nothing without you." I wiped my face.

  James stood still in shock. "Thomas I...didn't know you felt so strongly towards me." I shrugged "Always have." James held my hand "Why'd you go out with Maria?" The one question I'd never answered.

  I sighed "Maria is a very lonely girl....and I wanted a friend...so she and I crossed paths and it funny enough started with her file." James nodded. "But she wanted more. So I told her no of course, but she threatened that her boyfriend would exposed me as gay even though it wasn't true everyone would believe Reynolds. So I had to say yes. Maria took full control and from then on its quite self explaintory."

  James nodded. "I snooped a bit more...and uh...I thought you didn't have any other kinks?" He asked confused. i shook my head "I don't, she did. I had to go with it." James nodded. "So um.." He caressed my face "Are we still together then?" He asked obviously nervous. I smiled and nodded. "You haven't smiled in weeks." I nodded "I guess not.".

  James put his hand on my face "Go make yourself look handsome, I'm taking you out for dinner." My eyes lit up "You're kidding!" He shook his head. "Seven pm. We're going." He walked inside. I...I didn't fuck up. Holy shit! I got it right! I did it right!