Peculiarity(JeffMads/Modern AU)REVAMPING ❌

s e v e n t e e n

I closed the trunk of the car, James exhaled an exhausted sigh. I recognized a female figure, Abigail. I turned to James nervously. Since when did she live here? Didn't she move to mount Vernon? "Timmy Tom!!" I sighed looking down and spinning to see Abigail with a smile plastered across her face, I pushed myself into my Facade, I looked up a cocky smirk tugging at my lips. "Hello, hello."

James was already close enough for him to casually slide his hand into my back pocket. "How have you been?" I rolled my eyes "Like you don't stalk me on Instagram." I licked my teeth. Abigail giggled "You've got me! I just can't get rid of your handsome face." She said cupping my face in her hand "Well, I've gotta get home. You know how the pets are, always want food." I lied I felt James' confusion as she retracted her hand. "Alright. See you around hot stuff." She walked away sasily.

I got into the car quickly, James followed closley behind. "What's wrong Tommy?" I pulled out of my parking spot "Buckle in." I drove at about 30 miles per hour driving to my "safe place". James sighed "You remember Abigail?" James nodded "Your first girlfriend right?" I nodded "I gave her everything," I pulled into the epmty parking lot from the weeks prior.

"She kissed another guy." James nodded "did she apologise?" I nodded "did you accept it?" I shook my head "Not at first." James nodded "and after that? She say sorry?" I shook my head as tears started cascading down my face. "Not in between the guy she had her legs wrapped around..." I started full blown ugly sobbing James looked at me in awe.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I tried to calm down "I-I-I was a-ash-shamed." James put his hand on mine "I'm sorry Tommy.." I shook my head "I gave her the fucking world...I gave her everything..." My chest tightened. All I could do was cry "What did I do wrong...? How did I fuck up so bad?" I retracted my hand and hit the steering wheel.

James wiped my tear stained face "Tommy it's okay." I shook my head "I can't...I can't take back any of that time! I-I-I don't wanna fall in love again...she...she fucked it up..." James just kept wiping my face. "I..I can't do it.." I hit the steering wheel again. My breathing frantic.

"You're overreacting! He just kissed me a bit!"

I laughed arily "You had your tounge down his damn throat!" I stomped across the room

"Thomas you're way too over protective! I just made out with him for fucks sake!"

Abigail followed me as I walked to the kitchen "Sure Sure! Tell me anything! I bet if I hadn't found you two sooner you'd be sucking his dick somewhere."

Abigail stepped to me putting her hands on my chest "No one can compare to you." I pushed her away

"You think I believe that you're never gonna manipulate me ever again? After you almost let my friend finger you, come on now!"

She scoffed and rolled her eyes "What friend? Your boyfriend?" She asked pushing me backwards into the wall.

I started to hyperventilate. James wiped my face "Tommy, talk to me. You're worrying me." I shook my head, if I opened my mouth I felt the words leave me so I would close my mouth instantly. Is this a panic attack? I couldn't do anything but cry...and I am a really loud and ugly cryer. "Thomas...I'm gonna do something dumb." Wait what? Then James kissed me, sparks flew, I felt my anxiety melt away the more I focused on James. When he pulled away I was just a mute mess.

I felt tears continue to fall down my face. "Thomas.." I cried a bit less. "I don't understand this.." I said finally although it was quiet. "After she cheated on me...I lost faith. I said fuck love. I said I'd never fall in love again. I said...I'd never let my gaurd down ever again." I looking outside watching the rain fall slowly. "But hey, look at where I am now right?" I tried to force a laugh but it wouldn't happen.

James kissed me again. "How about we wait the rain out in the backseat, huh? Don't you have a blanket back there?" I nodded in agreement before unbuckling myself and climbing into the back. James pushed his seat up and sat on the floor by my head. "Thomas, do you want to tell me anything else about her?" I gulped.

"She hurt me. Alot." James nodded. I pointed to a small scar on my neck "She cut me once. It was hard." James climbed on top of me and kissed me. "Tommy, is that it?" I nodded "Not a lot compared to what-" he shook his head cutting me off "No, No, No. I just..." I stared at the ceiling a numb feeling taking over. "I kept asking myself why I'm waiting for someone who didn't care about me."

James nodded "I understand that."

Abigail sighed "Look I'm sorry." She tried to step over to me.

I stepped back

"Timmy Tom, you know I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Did you?" I asked looking down.

"I just got angry with you I'm-" I cut her off shaking my head

"I don't want to be with you anymore..." I hesitantly admited.

"Fine. Go be with that queer James." She teased pushing past me

"You know what! Fuck you Abby! I can get any girl I want." She scoffed rolling her eyes

"Yeah right. Why don't you try sucking some dick and dying instead huh?"

"I want to die." I whispered. James shook his head "I'm dying with you. I don't care how." I attempted to force a smile but to no avail. "Jemmy.." He hummed. "I'm suicidal." James nodded. "I want to kill myself." I started to cry again. "Tommy, I don't want you to though." I sobbed "I..I don't want to live with this anymore.." James wiped my face as I continued to talk. "I wanna be burried in magenta." James smiled "I wanna bd burried in grey." I nodded "I want a laid back funeral." James dropped his smile quickly "I want it to be on my birthday. Or yours." He shushed me "don't talk like that." I shook my head "I wanna shoot myself. It's the fastest...I might slit my wrists, make myself suffer y'know." James shook his head "No.." I nodded.

"I wanna come out to the school before I do it." James kissed me "Tommy I can't survive without you." I shrugged "you'll get over it." He shook his head "No. I won't." I sighed catching my breath "You can live with Lee or Burr. They'll take good care of you." James shook his head "I couldn't live with myself..." I shrugged "I'll watch over you.' James wiped my face. "Thomas no." I nodded James shook his head "I'll kill myself." I was shocked by James' words. "Why?" He sighed "I'm in love with you Thomas." I laughed airily "What even is love?" James held my hand "Love is the spark that creates a fire that bruns for years. Love is the connection two people like us that are meant to be together feel. The butterflies, the lust the happiness the sadness. It's being able to stay no matter what." He explained.

"It's never wanting to be away from someone despite how dangerous they may be. Tommy, you're capable of choking a man to death, I should be afraid of you but you can't be. That's love." I smiled "You're so poetic when you want to be." James giggled "I try."