Brendon's pov I watched as josh walked out before he shut the door, I said " okay babe". He probably didn't catch it I think to myself as I stare up at the ceiling pain kicking back in. The smirk fading form my face as the memories of what happened flood all back in.
/time skip featured by the hiatus/
Josh finally had come back with the doctor. I pulled on a fake smile as I looked at the both of them. Pushing away my pain and thoughts. The doctor walked over to me and so did Josh, he walked over to the other side. "So Brendon, how are you feeling" he asked as he look at me. "I feel okay." I said back as I look at him. "Good good. I just need to go over a few things with you" I nodded as I moved my hand trying to find Josh's. If Zack canceled the show then anything could happen, my thoughts ran wild about what the doc was going to tell me. The doc had said the usual, "Can't smoke weed, have sex, drink" I froze as I heard the last one. "Can't sing.."
No..
"No that-" I said as I looked at josh, my eyes open wide out of shock. That brown eyed boy looked back at me the same way.
Was I hearing that right..? I couldn't be right..
"I am sorry Mr. Urie, but yes you will have to cancel the tour..you have gone through a lot of surgeries and exams. You could end up dying. That is a big risk." He said with sympathy in his tone as he looked at me I looked away from him, at the wall in front of me. Trying to rap my mind still around what he had said.
Josh's pov-
I looked back at Brendon as he looked away form the doctor. He was sad.
Singing, the band it meant so much to him an as everything. The shows. The tour. The fans. Gone like that in this moment..
I snapped out of my thoughts as I looked over at the doctor, "thank you..." then I looked down. I rather have him alive than singing.
I care about him.
Brendon's pov
The doc after that unplugged me, for all the monitors and machines then left. Then it was just us.
Alone. In silence.
I could tell josh was looking at me, knowing that I am heartbroken and beaten up of this.
I am.
"I am sorry bren.."
I said nothing. I was just stuck in my own thoughts, what if's, questions that I know the answers to but I don't want to believe, about the tour, the rest of the show that night, the fans , the people that came and where excited, the people who didn't go but were going to a different show, DMs saying how they were excited and pumped up and a lot of other emotions to see panic! live, there stories, problems, about how I saved them and inspired them. I was happy, ready, excited, pumped, an more. But look at me now
Hospitalized Weak Messed up Sad Out of it Lost Hopeless
....
I snapped out of my thoughts an answered Josh. "You have nothing to be sorry about love, it's okay." I put on a fake smile as I finally looked at him. The voices soon chiming in my head. "I know this is hard for you...but the fans will understand. They rather have you alive then gone Brendon.
We all do.
Just.. just know that they always love you and care.."
Josh's pov -
I couldn't find the right words but I tried. It's true though, the fans love him as care about him and rather have him alive then not. We all do.
He's not going to be happy for a while..is he..
Yes and your just making it worse by being there , by being alive.
Brendon's pov-
"Yeah I know that, thanks josh. For caring, for staying, for a hell lot more. Everyone was just so excited and happy to see us live, I got DMs form fans that they where feeling that way, I got to know there stories, there problems. That I SAVED them. I was so happy and really excited for this tour am just like that it's gone in a flash. Just because of stupid old me. I don't know how I am going to head back to La. What to do. How long I stay like this.." I say laying back and looking up at the ceiling as I groan slightly. Josh takes my hand. "Maybe it will only take a few months.. it sound long and it will feel long. But you'll be fine soon bren, I know that you are strong and will get though this. An like I said you are going to stay with me for the time being." He said as he gave me a small half smile, as I looked at him. "Alrighty then, but that's only if you allow me to stay love." I smirk slightly looking at him taking him all in once again.
His mocha brown eyes. His bright yellow highlighter hair. His lips.
"I will allow you to,,, but I don't have a spare room. Soooo, you will have to share with me." He smirks back, I snap out of my trance as he speaks and looks back at me. I blush slightly, " okay I am fine sleeping with you. I will always sleep with you when I come here now and when I have the choice to" I smirk back at him. "Then we will need to switch spots till I feel better" I say in a little kid impression. "I am fine with that" we both still smirk. As josh soon laughs, and smiles at me. Probably form my impression. I smile back at him. "You ready to leave Brendon.." he smirks. I give him the death glare. "Don't you-" he cuts me off, "or should I say are you ready to goooooooooooo ooooh ooo kiddo" he chuckles at the end as he looks at me. "You are so dead Joshua William Dun. But anyway yes daddy" I smile and then smirk as I hold out my hand for him to take. He blushes, and smiles back at me.
God he's a angel. I thought as I looked at my best friend. My love. My light.
-
A/N / FORESHADOWING HMMM WHO KNOWS 💞 Here's a photo of the beautiful boys
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
