Just let go (New Chapter) Pt.1

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Part 1 of the two chapters for the honeymoon.

The dynamic in our relationship was changing minute by minute and hour by hour. For one, he quickly relayed how he felt. Nothing was being held back anymore by him or myself. It was a bit harder for me to say how I felt when I wasn't brought up that way but he stressed that he was a straight forward man so it was fine. After a breakfast we went for a long walk through the private jungle behind our house. The steep mountains and the sounds of wild birds squawking caused for the most serene setting. Most of our walk was quiet and we stopped momentarily so I could take pictures with my phone of my surroundings. That "super tea " (as I called it) really worked because I didn't feel an ounce of pain. If anything it energized me. After we got to higher altitudes in the jungle we sat on a log near a small stream at the top of the mini mountains of our private island. I drank from my water canister watching the beauty all around me not realizing he was looking at me.

" You know. You are not exactly what I thought you'd be if I'm being honest ", he sparked up conversation. I turned to him wanting to hear more.

" Really ? And how did you expect me to be ? ", I ask.

" Well...most highborn girls are very snobbish or cold. Some are very spoiled and childish despite their education. Trust me I've met other suitors. Not anybody I'd pursue but just in social settings. You are ...kind ", he explained.

" You think so ? ", I chuckled.

" Yes. You have a goodness about you. It makes people feel safe ", he elaborated. I smiled sweetly that he thought of me that way.

" Well I'm glad you think so highly of me ", I laughed at the randomness of it all.

" And finding out that you worked and tried to help those immigrant children when you knew the possibilities of illness. That's very heroic. People say they care but rarely do they act on it. It takes a lot of guts to do something ABOUT something. You know people talk all day and have nothing to show for it. But you...you do ", he analyzed me closely. Those round eyes had zeroed in on me in the most flattering yet uncomfortable way. I looked forward from the heart radiating off my very own face. He could charm the lock off a chastity belt for god sake.

" You spoil me with your compliments. You know I could say the same for you. Since I can remember I was trained by my father's court to be your wife. I didn't know what to expect. They thought you were going to be very militant and probably far from warm and loving at all. Especially with all the accolades under you're belt. Who needs time for love and affection from a wife ....", I laughed slightly at the thought.

" Elaborate ", he said.

" Well you and your sister's IQ's are ground breaking. I wasn't sure if I could keep up with somebody so smart in such tough areas. I was a straight A student but that only takes you so far. . You've also got a PHD from Oxford. You're randomly chemist which you never talk about. You have even managed to make your very own field of science called " Shadow Physics " to mention you live on the most wealthy advanced place on earth. Plus countless other accolades. I really truly can't imagine how you'd needing anything else ", I looked at him and shrugged.

" Those accolades mean absolutely nothing if you have nobody to share them with. You can share them with your family but your  family can't provide you with every need you desire. Our family knows who we are but sometimes they aren't the ones you want to tell everything to. You need somebody you can relate to, somebody who can understand you ", he countered.

" I just didn't expect you to be this way. To me you are like a river. Calm and nourishing to a lot of people but strong. Not someone to be taken for granted. I was scared that you'd change since I saw you last. There were things I feared like...having to give up my body without my own consent, or fear of you being mean to me, or fear that I was burden to your life. There are so many things a woman fears in an arranged marriage. Society makes us think that once a woman exchanges vows with a man she is no longer her own person but rather an extension of him. To find out who you are and to feel safe with you is the biggest relief. It's also not have bad that I have feelings for you ", I gasped at the end of my statement looking forward with wide eyes. The truth slipped out of my mouth again. I didn't know why I preferred to keep that to myself but I just didn't think twice about it. T'Challa smile widely.

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