Should Have Known (Camren)

Chapter 15

Camila didn't speak to me for two weeks. She avoided at me at all costs and only pretended that nothing was wrong when we were on camera. She kept her distance and I kept mine. We performed I'll Stand By You during the fourth live show, and although we performed it well, there was tension in the group. Camila and I weren't speaking and the girls were still confused about what had happened a week earlier. It affected our stage presence and the audience could tell we weren't together. We ended up in seventh place at the results show, moving down in the rankings instead of up.

Camila primarily hung out with Dinah during the week that followed while Normani bonded with Ally and I kept to myself. I wasn't embarrassed by what had happened, I was just angry with myself, and I wasn't sure how to explain the situation to the girls. Camila and I were drifting farther and farther apart with each passing day, and eventually I just accepted that things probably wouldn't ever be the same.

We all still acted like sisters, of course, and we were. We had no trouble joking around with one another during interviews and rehearsal. We had a strange bond that couldn't be broken, we had just hit a bump in the road and no one could figure out how to get over it.

Two weeks had passed since Camila walked out of the after party. Two agonizing weeks of sleeping without her. I craved her lips every time I closed my eyes. I craved her touch and her smell and that light in her eyes that had since disappeared. I could have apologized, but I didn't know how. How does one apologize for being in love?

On the day of the fifth live show, only three hours before we were set to report to wardrobe, I heard a quiet knock on my door. I got off the couch despite the ache in my chest wearing me down, expecting it to be one of the girls or even Keaton, anyone but Camila who appeared on the other side.

"Hey," she whispered.

Her eyes were fixed on the floor but she was staring at something unknown, a glassy look replacing the spark that usually resided in the deep chocolate eyes that I adored so much. They were bloodshot and her face was stained with tears, her nose red and her cheeks puffy.

"You should probably come with me," she instructed, walking back down the hall without making sure I had actually followed.

I had, of course, but I was worried. If she had come to talk things out she would have stayed in the room. Something else was going on, and I felt my stomach twist and turn, anxiously waiting to find out what had happened.

We stopped in front of Ally's door and Camila knocked although it was cracked slightly. She pushed it open and walked inside. Ally was sitting on the couch, flanked by Normani who was rubbing her back supportively, and Dinah who had her face buried in her hands. Ally wiped at her eyes with a tissue but nothing could stop the tears from falling. She sniffed and attempted to smile at me as I made my way into the room, and I could tell that the tears had been much worse before I had arrived. I was getting the tail end of the blow, the last few tears before the dull heartache spread through her body, and I mentally slapped myself for not being more attentive. Ally was my best friend and I had no idea that anything was even wrong.

"My grandpa died," she sobbed.

I looked to Camila who had since stopped crying, but I could tell that more tears were threatening to fall. I walked over to Ally and crouched in front of her, placing a hand on her knee and trying to comfort her as much as possible while my eyes began to water, the sight of her in so much pain proving to be too much for me to handle. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know her grandfather, but if he was anything like she was, he had to be wonderful. I didn't want to say, "Sorry for your loss," or, "Sorry to hear that," because that's the last thing she needed- to be reminded that he was gone. I couldn't even find the words to comfort her, so I just said nothing and gripped her hand as she cried.