Find You There (Fanfic Version)

Sixty

"Have you moved on, Tay?" Runner asks. "You've been lying about it for the past few minutes."

"I said, I have."

"According to your reaction, you haven't," Runner says and then smiles.

"I have moved on, Runner."

"Right, if you have," he trails on. There's a challenged look on his face. Usually, he'd never push me to my limits but that was years ago. . . Things change. "Then you wouldn't mind hearing the story of when he walked out."

He laughs a bit, but there was never the look of amusement, it's just his stern gaze, watching for my reaction.

"Trust me, Louis and I had wanted to break his face and I did have full intentions on doing so, but," he says.

But, as I recall, Louis said Runner stopped him from beating up Harry.

"You can't break anything else in a man who already has a broken heart. Everything inside him will just shatter on their own in the most painful way. . ."

I start shaking, my whole body feels like it's about to explode.

I've always told myself that I understood, that I know why Harry walked out. . . Because I've been a little too much for him. The accident was something more than he can handle but it never occurred to me how much harm it had brought him.

"Harry was more than shattered and he needed someone to ease it. . . But no one can ever fix it apart from you. And yet according to your story, you denied him that."

My eyebrows meet, "What?"

Naive. At the very moment, I am very naive of what he is talking about, mostly because I want to be.

"You're guilt-tripping me, aren't you?"

Runner has the look of determination and enjoyment on his face as he smiles at me. It's the same look he has on his face when he plays a good game, lookig back, it seemed like a very long time ago.

"Yeah, I am."

"Why?" I ask because there seemed to be no reason for him to do that. I was the one who got left behind, but now, I'm the one being seated in front of the jury.

"Because you're not the only victim in his choices. You're not the only one who's hurt. The world doesn't revolve on Rapunzel who turned to Sleeping Beauty then woke up without the prince."

"That's not what I--"

"Taylor," he cuts me off immediately. "If you tell the story to any stranger, that stranger would say, poor you, they would pity you and get angry at the other side. Other side, being Harry's side, wherein they never know what happened," Runner tries to explain and I'm trying my best to understand him. "All I'm saying is, you didn't let him explain."

I didn't let him explain. Did I?

"How did you know that?" I ask. Runner obviously knows something I don't.

"Because I wouldn't see him on the sports news too often if he's okay. Channel 78, you'll get my point."

"What?"

Runner pours juice into his glass, taking a very deep breath. "You're too slow, Taylor. It means, I'm seeing his side, Harry's side and it's not too hard to see Samara's side too. Tay, just because you're the side that got damaged the most, that never meant all the rest got the best time of their lives."

I open my mouth to go against him but he holds up his hand, then tells me that he's not finished yet.

"Harry is racing again. Samara gets pretty sad when he's away. Either way, sad when they're together."