Yogscast Child

Part 2, Chapter 1

Sam's POV:

I lay in bed, completely content. A small smile is etched onto my face, the same smile that's been stuck to me for the last few days. I'm happy. 

Lewis and Hannah surprised me with the guest room completely turned into my room. A beautiful wooden bed with posts supported a light green canopy over my head. A nightstand next to my bed held a sparkly lamp and had a couple of drawers for some of my journals and sketchbooks. They set me up a really cool desk too. And of course, Yogscast merch is... everywhere. It's perfect. 

The first time I saw it, I cried. I felt weird having them fuss over me, but they seemed to enjoy making me happy. They had seemed a bit surprised when I had screamed and jumped up and hugged them, but in a good way. Fast forward a few days, and here we are. 

I stretch out on my bed and flip over onto my back. I hang my head over the side of my bed like I did when I was little. Randomly, Eminem lyrics flood into my head. 

"Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human

What i gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman

Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is

Riccochet in off of me and it'll glue to you,"

"You are just a girl of surprises, aren't you?" Lewis says, walking into my room, scaring me so bad I fall off the bed, landing on the floor with a bang. 

"Ow..." I mutter, rubbing my head. 

Lewis looks concerned. Fear crosses his face making me sigh. I'm still considered extremely fragile, which kind of sucks. I don't feel fragile. I feel on top of the world at the moment.  

"Are you okay!? Do you want ice?" Lewis says, panic lacing his voice. His features contort into ones filled with love.

I struggle to keep a straight face but end up cracking a huge grin. He's so funny when he's worried. "Lewis, it's okay. I'm fine. It only hurt a little," I lie. 

He lets out a deep breath and smiles a little back at me. "So, do you want to tell me why you were hanging upside down, rapping Eminem?" 

I shrug my shoulders. "I just felt like it."  

He does his famous laugh and stands up, offering me a hand. I accept it and am pulled to my feet. "Get dressed, you psycho. Hannah and I have to talk to you about something important, okay?" 

I nod and push him out of my room. "I'll be ready in a few," I tell him. 

I head towards my closet and smile when I open it. Along with the room, Hannah decided to get me a whole wardrobe, filled not only with clothes, but shoes and jewlrey. It's awesome, but it's too much. I will owe them forever. 

It's still freezing outside, so I pull out some black leggings and a light blue sweater. I also grab some black vans and and some silver hoops. 

I am terrible at putting makeup on, but it has to be done. I feel hideous without it. Instead of struggling with foundation, I decide to just put on some BB cream and mascara. I try not to wear too much makeup. Although I want to hide my face, I don't want to look trashy. 

As I get dressed, I suddenly feel nervous. I wonder what they have to talk to me about. I hope it's not something bad. I don't want anything ruining my mood. 

I head into the bathroom next to brush my teeth. As I look into the mirror, I see my father staring back at me, his face contorted into a cruel grin. I drop my toothbrush and let out a scream. 

"Sam! Are you okay?" Hannah rushes into the bathroom and wraps her arms around me. 

"What's wrong honey?" 

I shake my head. "Nothing," I whisper. 

"Obviously something is wrong. Look at yourself, you are shaking," she says. 

I look down at myself and see that she's right. My body is shivering. I squeeze my hands into fists and force myself to stop shaking. I won't let him get the better of me. The memories of everything are still engraved into my head, clear as day. But that won't stop me from trying to forget. 

"I'm seriously fine," I whisper again, "I just scared myself." 

Hannah gives me a comforting look that tells me she knows what I'm feeling. "If you want to talk, I'm here." She kisses my head and leaves me to finish brushing my teeth. 

I grab my toothbrush and try to control my breathing. "Everything is okay," I try saying quietly to myself. 

Maybe I am fragile. 

Hannah's POV:

The past few days have been amazing, really amazing. Sam has been the daughter I always wanted. When she saw her room we decorated for the first time, it made me so happy to see her so happy. 

We've all been growing pretty close, which is great. I was nervous that Sam might feel awkward of uncomfortable around us, but she seems okay. I'm worried about her though. 

I know she seems okay right now, but things are going to be rough on her. With her past... everything is going to catch up to her. Plus, I know she has panic attacks. I hope we can help her move on. It''s going to be tough though. I can just feel it. Mother's intuition. 

I catch myself saying that. Mother's intuition. I'm a mom. I'm a freaking mom! Am I fit to be a mom!? I don't even know. I glance at the owls on the bed and laugh a little. Probably not. But sod it. I'll do the best I can. 

As I think, I hear Sam scream from the bathroom. I rush in and see her staring at the mirror, terror in her eyes. She's shaking. 

"Sam! Are you okay?" I throw my arms around her when she doesn't answer. "What's wrong honey?" 

I know what's wrong. I just want her to admit it to herself. 

She shakes her head at me. "Nothing." 

"Obviously something is wrong. Look at yourself, you are shaking," I say. It scares me, seeing her in such a state. I can tell she's hurting. As I look at her, I feel like the bruises and scrapes are magnified. I hate that man who dare calls himself a father. 

"I'm seriously fine. I just scared myself," she says. I see her struggling to put on a brave face, trying to stop her shaking. She's too strong for her own good. She needs to let others help her. 

"If you want to talk, I'm here," I tell her. She stares wonderingly at me. I bet she's never had anyone say that to her. Has anyone ever listened to her?

She doesn't answer me, so I take that as she doesn't want to talk. I leave her alone to finish brushing her teeth. 

The first thing I do once I leave Sam is head straight to the kitchen to talk to Lewis. 

When I walk in, he gives me a bright smile. "I'm making my girl's breakfast," he says to me. I try and give him a small smile but fail. I sit down in the chair and explain to him what just happened and my fears. He listens intently, his face changing to match his emotions. 

When I finish, he comes over and kisses me. "It will be okay. Sam's just been through a lot. We're going to help her, alright. She will talk when she wants to." 

I nod. He cuddles me close and I put my head on his shoulder. 

"I-I just love her so much," I tell him. 

"I know Hannah. I do too. Everything is going to work out, okay?" 

"Okay."