Say You Won't Let Go ➵ Camren

Chapter 14

No one warns you how much it hurts waking up alone, especially after you spent the night giving your body to someone else. No one tells you how used and empty you might feel. At least that's how Camila felt when she woke up the next morning to an empty bed and a note.

I know we need to talk, but I'm not foolish enough to think that anything changed because of last night. I'm sorry for allowing it to go that far, it shouldn't have. I'm sorry for everything Camila. I'll be busy for the rest of the trip here, so you'll get the space I'm sure you need.
- Lauren

Hurt doesn't begin to describe how Camila was feeling. She truly believed that Lauren regretted having been with her last night. Lauren knew that they should talk but she found herself avoiding the brunette.

The older girl woke up too early and hung out in the hotel's gym for a couple of hours blowing off steam. Lauren had music blaring in her headphones but her mind was still drowning with thoughts of Camila.

She didn't want to deal with having an awkward and hurtful conversation with her, so she left her the note. The singer figured Camila wouldn't have changed her mind about them, and that killed her inside. For the first time in a long time, she had sex that felt like it was more than sex. That was seriously throwing her off completely.

The gym didn't have a punching bag like she would if she was home, but she ran on the treadmill until her legs felt like jelly. She headed towards the gyms shower in order to avoid Camila some more, completely ignoring the lingering eyes from the people in the gym that recognized her.

She didn't have to be at the studio for another couple of hours but there was no way she could face Camila now. She ended up visiting her bandmates in their suite to pass the time. She felt angry at them for putting her in this fucked up situation with the younger girl and possibly worsening their relationship or friendship or whatever. If she's being honest though, she really blames herself.

It was early in the afternoon and Dinah was getting ready to go to her photoshoot. Ally was tagging along with her, while Normani decided to hang around the City.

Lauren didn't want to tell them what happened between her and Camila. Instead, she asked if the brunette was going with Dinah...which she wasn't. It worried green-eyed girl, so she lingered around waiting for Dinah to leave with Ally to talk to Normani alone.

The darker girl knew something was up when Lauren began asking her to hangout with Cuban. She didn't know why she just didn't take Camila out herself. Nonetheless, she promised she'd take her wherever she wanted to go in New York during the day.

In the other suite, Camila was trying her hardest not to show how upset she was while facetiming Kellz. She managed to convince Dinah and Ally that she didn't want to go to the photoshoot because she was tired, which wasn't a complete lie.

After reading and tearing up the note, she showered trying to wash Lauren off of her. Also, she asked the cleaning lady to change the sheets. She was just trying to erase last night but every time she moved and felt sore, she was instantly brought back to the reason why.

Now she was sitting in the hotel room going over some lyrics with Kellz.

"Sing it back to me," Kellz said making Camila groan.

"This is how you're going to be in the studio isn't it?" she asked.

"Worse," he laughed. "You have so much potential but the attention span of a puppy, so focus."

Camila huffed staring at him through her phone. She took a swig of her water and cleared her throat.

"Am I out of my head?
Am I out of my mind?
If you only knew the bad things I like.
Don't think that I can explain it.
What can I say? It's complicated.
Don't matter what you say,
Don't matter what you do,
I only wanna do bad things to you.
So good, that you can't explain it.
What can I say? It's complicated. "