Shattered Memories. (Castiel x reader)

Voices.

They worked well into the morning before I was in a half decent shape.  The wounds had stopped bleeding at least.  That was the main concern between them.  They walked downstairs completely exhausted.  Dean had fallen asleep on the couch in the living room.  Cas was sitting calmly, waiting for word of her condition at the kitchen table.   He looked up as they walked into the kitchen.

"How is she?" Cas asked.

"As good as she will be for now," Bobby said.

"Can I go see her?"

"Yeah, she's not awake though," Sam replied.

Cas didn't hesitate to leave the room.  He hurried up the stairs.  I was laying on the blood stained bed.  The wounds had been stitched for the time being.  His hand grabbed mine and held it tightly.  My face scrunched as I started to wake slightly.  I groaned and tried to sit up, but I couldn't manage to do so.

"Why did you do something so reckless?" Cas asked.

"Wouldn't you do the same for me?" I joked.

"This isn't funny, ____, you could have died."

"But I didn't."

He gave me a stern glare.  What else was I supposed to do? Let him forget me forever?  That wasn't an option.  This wasn't enough to kill me, I just couldn't heal myself or be healed.  I just had to wait and heal naturally.

"But, I should thank you.  You did a lot to get my memories back," he said with a slight blush.

"You just weren't you like that."

"I'm so sorry.  That fight was pointless."

"You were trying to keep me safe, it's okay," I said.

"I can't believe it was two years ago.  Two years."

"It was a long time ago.  But I had a few fun adventures during my time flying solo.  I got to see a lot of places.  It was very lonely though.  I mean, at least Sam and Dean have each other."

"I should have checked on you."

"It's okay, Cas, you didn't know me.  I was just a random person that you never met."

"No, that's not okay!" he blurted suddenly, "you were never just a random person to me.  Even when I forgot I knew there was something about you."

"Can't change the past," I sighed.

Would I have liked to had those years together? Of course.  But we couldn't change what had happened.  And I wouldn't have changed it for anything.  Everything was back to normal, it was worth it.   But I could see regret wash over Cas' face.

"Don't even think about it, Cas."

"What?"

"Gong back and trying to change things.  Everything happens for a reason."

"Are you reading my mind now?" he joked.

"No, I just know how you think."

My head turned slightly giving a soft smile.  Cas let go of my hand.  He sat back in the chair.  I tried again to sit up, but his hands pressed gently against my shoulders.

"You need to rest.  Just lay there and relax."

"I hate just laying around. It's boring," I huffed.

"Well that's your fault," he said sternly, "I would never have asked you to do something so reckless."

"That's why I didn't tell anyone what I was doing.  Someone would have tried to stop me."