Shattered Memories. (Castiel x reader)

Feelings Are Confusing.

A bit of some adult level action in here. So read with caution, or excitement, I don't care.

It was a full day until I came to. Cas was on the other side of the room speaking quietly. It sounded like he was talking to Sam and Dean. The call ended and he sat right back down next to me. I sat up and leaned against the wall behind the bed. He looked over at me.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

"I guess. I still hurt a bit," I replied.

"I want to help you."

"You shouldn't be here if being an angel was important to you."

"Why?"

Crowley's words danced in my head. I lost sight of why I was there. Because I cared more about him than any of the others. I followed him blindly and caused him so much pain.

"That's why?" he asked.

"Cas, you know I hate you getting in my head."

"You're a human. A complicated one. I can't understand you."

He never knew what I was? Even if I told him he would say well you're a lesser deity. The angels barely recognized me over the humans as it were.

"Wait, you just said that's why. You heard...what?" I asked suddenly turning red.

"That you think it is because you fell in love with me."

He wasn't even fazed saying it. Cas was as blunt as I remembered. I covered my face with a pillow and screamed into it.

"I'm not offended. I should take this as a compliment."

"Yeah, Cas. It's a compliment."

"If it's any consolation, you make me feel very confused."

"I don't think that is really the right answer," I sighed.

His hand slipped into mine. The warmth of his fingers filled the space between my own. My heart was racing.

"I thought you were dead. Now that I know you aren't I want to be the one to protect you. Always," he said.

"Cas, you're different," I blushed.

"I'm more human now, but you still don't remember, do you?"

"Remember what?"

His free hand poked my forehead. A slew of memories released. My eyes shut as the images rushed to my mind.

Some were him watching over me. Others were him smiling while I wasn't looking. They were old and new from when we met again. But one in particular stood out. It was a darkened room and I sat alone. My hands chained to the ground. Tomorrow I would be killed. And all I wanted was to talk to Castiel. The door unlocked and swung open. Footsteps came closer. A small amount of light was shining through a window. The figure stooped before me. He looked at me. His blue eyes somehow more brilliant than ever.

"Cas," I smiled, "you shouldn't be here."

"I'm getting you out of here," he said.

My hand grabbed his arm tightly. He looked back into my eyes.

"Don't you dare, Cas, you'll suffer the same fate as me if you do."

"I cannot let this..."

"Cas, please. You know what I am. I've always been expendable."

"But even you care for the weakest humans. Someone should help you."