Imperfect Mate

Chaper 20- Is this even Love?

Chapter 20- Is this even Love?
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"Would you just quit your complaining, Estelle?" Rangel growls at me. "This will work."

I jump to the ground from his arms, gazing up into his bright yellow eyes.

"Rang, I was out of my mind when I suggested this," I tell him, the both of us standing outside of the gates leading to Alpha's Headquarters.

"So says the one who kissed me back," Rangel mumbles, unhitching the gate and stepping through. "You have something for me, Estelle. Quit denying it."

Having no words to backfire, I stand there speechless unable to move.

He was right, I did have something for him and I hated myself for it. He's selfish, rude, abusive, demanding, and more. The list could go on forever...

But when he makes a move to kiss me, of course feelings will unfold unluckily. And that's why we're walking up the path to Alpha's Headquarters. Rangel believes this will work out in the future and will drag me to the front doors if I didn't walk up the path.

I'll still deny that I somewhat have something for him. There's no way he could be good for my health now or ever in a pack together.

"You've got to cut this act," Rangel says, cutting off the silence as we approached the steps up to the doors. "It's not going to help our case."

"What act?" I wonder. "If it's just one kiss that's got you basically hauling me up these stairs right now, you're blind to all the other times I've kissed you."

"You sound ridiculous," he replies. "I know when you have feelings for me and I'm going to get all this CottonWood bullshit out of the way of our lives. Leon, Jared, and anyone who's trying to interfere with us will be gone forever after this."

"And I know when somebody isn't for me," I say back to him. "I'd stop myself from ever loving you for my own health."

That's when Rangel put his arm out to stop me from stepping up the stairs any farther, caressing my face with his hands.

"To think you'd ever do that is completely insane," he breaths. "Sure, sometimes I'm completely angry and you just have to understand I'm trying to control myself most of the time."

"Control yourself from what exactly?" I question him.

"From hurting you," he replies. "I have anger problems and I bitterly hate myself for it."

Rangel grabs my wrist he once attacked and lifted it so the scars were visible. He looks me in the eyes sternly and rubs his thumb over the bumpy scars gently.

"Listen Estelle, I'm trying to change," he tells me, searching my eyes with his soft dim ones. When they were bright, he was either angry or lustful and when they were dim he was serious and calm.

"Rangel, stop this self pity," I say, yanking my wrist away from him. "You can't erase the past like nothing happened and you can't change yourself that drastically to actually be likable."

I know what I said was probably harsher then it had to be, but he needs to understand that before we commit to leaving CottonWood he has to fix himself.

"Well, why am I even standing here then?" He asks, turning and striding down the steps quickly.

"Wait, Rangel!" I shout, hurrying after him. "Let me explain!"