A Hole in One's Heart [Kakashi Hatake]

Chapter 68: Acorns and Noses

So this is a fun bit of filler before the Fourth Great Ninja War begins next chapter. If you haven't yet watched Naruto Shippuden Episode 241 "Kakashi, My Eternal Rival" (it's in the Paradise Life on a Boat Arc and you learn about how Guy and Kakashi became rivals) then I highly suggest that you do. Both because it is absolutely hysterical and because I reference it some in this chapter. You definitely don't need to watch it to read this chapter, though, if you don't want to watch anything. I'm not commanding you; I'm just making a friendly suggestion. Alrighty then, enjoy!

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     I entered Lady Tsunade's new building to see why I hadn't been assigned a division for the coming war. Naruto had been gone for almost a week now on his journey to some safe location isolated from the war and the legion of crazies that wanted to suck the tailed beast out of him. I knocked and Kakashi was in there talking to Tsunade, and, surprisingly, Shizune was not there as well. I figured that she was probably off helping the medical units prepare.

     "Kakashi, what are you doing here?" I looked at him inquisitively. It's not like he wasn't close to Lady Tsunade or anything like that; he just usually doesn't spend a ton of time with her.

     "Oh, I just saw Naruto and Guy."

     "Huh?" Now I was really confused. "Aren't they on a boat far away?"

     "Yes. But you see Guy accidentally sent out his messenger tortoise with an S.O.S. when he was super motion sick, and of course I set out right away. Unfortunately, he didn't realize that he had sent it out so he thought that I was an enemy in disguise and tried to kill me." That sounded like something that Guy would do.

     "Well, that sounds... eventful." Then I remembered something. Literally the best vision ever. I saw what Kakashi had to tell Guy to convince him that he was the real Kakashi and not a fake. It was something that a very young Kakashi had said to a very young Guy, and it was super emasculating. I fell to the ground and started rolling around with laughter.

     Kakashi looked at me in worry, "Ana... are you okay?"

     "A-A-Acurms." I laughed out.

     "What?"

     "ACORNS!" I shouted and then doubled over with even more laughter.

     Kakashi chuckled, "So you know about that too now, huh? Guy won't be happy to hear that."

     Lady Tsunade smacked her hands down on the table, "What on earth are you two talking about?"

     I laughed even harder, "Y-You da-don't want to kn-know!" Tears were flowing from the corners of my eyes.

     Kakashi stood me up, "Okay Ana, it's pretty funny, but not that funny. Come on, pull yourself together."

     "But it is that funny!" I started taking some deep breaths trying to calm down, and my stomach literally hurt from laughing that hard. "I just can't believe that I had ever been able to forget that! It was literally my favorite episode ever!"

     He sighed, "I don't even want to know. And you call me the pervert."

     "I wouldn't call you a pervert if that wasn't the case."

     Tsunade smacked her hands on the desk again, and it quivered with the impact. "Either you two go get a room or you tell me why you came here in the first place. I'm pretty busy right now preparing for a war if you haven't noticed!"

     "Oh, so sorry, Lady Tsunade." I wiped the tears that were still leaking from my eyes and tried as hard as I could to pull myself together. "I came to inquire as to why I wasn't assigned to a division for the upcoming war."