The Bad Boy Changed Me | ✔

Chapter 22

I wake up and immediately dread the rest of the day. I hate myself and I hate the rest of the world. I drive to school and turn on the radio to ease my mind. "Good to be Alive" by Andy Grammer starts playing. Ironic.

I plug my phone in with the AUX Cord and press shuffle. The first song is "Life is Worth Living" by Justin Bieber. Even more ironic.

I just decide not to listen to music. Clearly, this won't work.

As I walk into school, everyone just stares at me. I go to my locker and people keep whispering around me. Wow. Word travels around fast. Drew walks up to me and tilts his head to the side.

"Hey, you okay?" he asks.

"No." I answer honestly. I'm depressed. My best friend hates me, I hate my mother, my brother and father are leaving, Luke is in the hospital (in a coma), and Cole broke up with me because I "spend too much time with Drew" which is bullshit because Tori said that I spend too much time with Cole.

Moral of the story: Everyone hates me.

"I know that there is nothing I can do to help you." he says.

"Ya. Just be there for me when I need it." A generic answer. He hugs me and I don't embrace it but i don't squirm to get out. I just let it happen.

Drew spent the whole weekend with me, but Drew doesn't understand how I feel. He just doesn't understand how desperate I am to have someone say, I love you and I support you just the way you are because you're wonderful just the way you are. I can't remember anyone ever saying that to me. I am so difficult to deal with because I want to crumble and fall apart. I wish that my friends would love me even though I am no fun, lying in bed, crying all the time, not moving.

We walk to first period.

For the next few weeks, our routine looks like this. People whisper as I walk in. Drew walks up to me and hugs me. And I think about how I wish that Tori and Connor were still there for me.

A few weeks after my life started falling apart

Drew's POV

Lately, Roxy has been acting really weird. I understand that she is going through a lot because Cole broke up with her, but it's going a little overboard. She doesn't want to talk to me or anyone and she constantly ignores me. And if I did something wrong, she won't tell me.

"Hey, Roxy." I grab her attention before we head to lunch.

"Ya?" She turns my way.

"What's wrong?" My head tilts to the left and my eyebrows crinkle.

"Nothing." She fakes a smile.

"I can see right through your smile. Roxy, I'm serious. There's something wrong."

"No there's not." She acts innocently.

"I know a lot of stuff is going on in your life, but you used to try and stay positive no matter what. Now, you are just gloomy and boring to be around." I speak the truth. She's not the same Roxy's she used to be.

"I told you, you don't have to stay with me through all of this. Go back to you old friends and stuff."

"I don't want to. I will support you no matter what. That's what friends are for. Just talk to me."

She turns around and walks away. I'll never get her to open up to me. She has been going to poker very often. Cole stopped going, so at least it's not awkward. I try to convince her not to go, or else she will just drown in her problems, but it seems like she doesn't care.

The things she used to care about are gone. She couldn't care less. She's always sad, doesn't care about anything she used to, fakes a smile to stop from talking about her feelings, she's distant, never eats, never sleeps, etc.

Oh my god.

She's depressed. She has depression. That is why she has been acting so different lately.

I barge through the lunch room and pull Roxy aside.

"We are going." I say in a demanding tone.

"Where? I'm hungry."

"I'll buy you something." I say willingly.

"Actually, I'm not that hungry." She decides. That's what I thought.

I grab her by the arm and practically drag her out of the school. I drive to her doctor as fast as I can. We have the same doctor.

"Where are we going?" She asks again.

"To get help."

"I don't need help!" She whines.

"You may not want help, but there's a difference between need and want."

"Fine. I don't want your help. Stop the car right now." she says sternly.

"I'm doing this for your own good."

"I don't care!" She yells with anger. "I don't want or need your help! This is why I didn't want to tell you! Or anyone for that reason. " She huffs and crosses her arms. She stares out the window and I immediately feel guilt and regret, but I keep driving because I know it's good for her.

I convinced her to at least talk to the doctor whether I'm in the room or not. She didn't let me stay in the room. As she comes out of the room, I stand up and look at the doctor. 

"Moderate to severe depression. She has thoughts of suicide, but she won't tell me why so keep an eye on her." The doctor says to me.

I walk over to Roxy and place my arm around her shoulder. She rests her head on my shoulder and we stand like that for a while.

"You feel better?" I ask.

"No." She says.

"Yes you do. You just don't me to say 'I told you so'." I smirk and turn the smirk into a smile quickly. I care about this girl and I want what is best for her.

"Shut up." She cracks a smile after straining. That is the first smile I have seen in 3-4 weeks. "I guess it wasn't that bad." She shrugs.

We leave the office and decide to skip the rest of school. We grab some McDonald's and head home after a long day.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~ 

a/n

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~Ish