Troubled -A Part of Dark like Me.-

*39* Another Day

At the three month mark, I am woken up at 7:05m by Jax and Lele shouting, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ALLYIRA!"

"Ugh!" I groan and pull the sheets over my head. "It's early, though."

"Get up!" Jax demands with a giggle as she snatches the covers off me.

"Okay, okay." I say getting up and rubbing my eyes.

It has been a month since Shakur had told me how he felt and his plans for when he leaves. I had not told neither Lele or Jax about anything I and Shakur discussed because I am still trying to figure out what I am going to do.

When therapy rolled around both group and with Dr. Axel, I still said nothing about Shakur and I, even when I was asked. I would just say, "We're friends." And leave it at that. James pushed, as did Maisie but they got nothing from me, Maisie was the main one pushing though. She can be so nosey when she wants to know something.

With Dr. Axel, she asked me and I said nothing. I wondered how these people are finding out about this after a month of either Shakur or I saying anything to anyone. I would like to think that some of the patients have seen us making googly eyes at each other or spending more time around each other. Then went back with their own assumptions and told everyone what they thought.

I am grateful when Art rolls around because we went out to the pool outside instead of staying inside and drawing or listening to Mr. Spaggiari's lecture about attaching art to emotions. And drawing with your heart and soul. I know we probably are not supposed to get in the pool, but I took my socks and shoes off, and put my feet in the pool with my sketch notebook on my lap. I am getting ready to sketch the children's east wing building. It has so many complicated structures and colors.

Mr. Spaggiari comes up to me, blocking my sunlight. I look behind me. "Oh...hello, Mr. Spaggiari."

His brow lower as he peers at me in a way that I have seen him 'secretly' do since I got here. I frown as he crosses his arms across his chest and peer down at me. I bite my bottom lip as I try to figure out what his issue is. My breathing quickens and I begin to fidget with my pencil as he continues to stand over me with this look of pleasure.

I get up, leaving my things along with my socks and shoes, and walk back to the building as calm as possible, in search of Dr. Axel.

I find her having lunch in her office and closes her door behind me. I am not sure if I am the only one who comes to see her more times, than I am scheduled to. However, rules did say if you are having an issue, talk to your therapist. And I am having all kinds of issues, right now.

"Allyira?" Dr. Axel questions in concern. She gets up from her desk and walks over to me. "Allyira, what's wrong?" She removes hair from my face. "Allyira?"

I tilt my head feeling a little dazed, but I do look up at Dr. Axel. "I don't want to be in the Art program anymore." My voice hoarse.

"Okay. Sit down and tell me why?" She says sitting me down on the sofa.

"He has been eyeing me weirdly for a while and it has been weirding me out. I know his program is....number one but I am very uncomfortable with him staring at me." Voice now brittle. "I...I can't."

"It's alright. I will fix it." She goes to her drawers and pulls out a pamphlet, then comes and sits by me. "His program isn't the only one that's been ranked number one here." She hands me the pamphlet.

I take it and look through it. Most of the programs seemed as if they were leisure time activities.

"Where are your socks and shoes, Allyira?" Dr. Axel asks looking at my bare and pale feet.