The Diary of a Struggling Genderfluid: 2

Slam Poem: PTSD

The rain it seems has come again

Saturating my mind and rusting the cage door clean off

It was so sudden

All at once, I couldn't stop it

I had forgotten the feeling of drowning inside of my own mind.

My head was sent spinning

My heart was not winning

And my chest was constricted in a terrible pain.

The screams of the past gripped my throat like a vice

I couldn't breathe, couldn't get out my voice.

The tears ran down my face in rivers

Which subsided into terrible shivers

As the memories continued to bombard me with their bullets.

There is no escape.

Everywhere I turn

Everything I've tried to burn

Follows me.

Everything I touch and feel

I have to wonder

Is it real?

There is nothing in my sight that doesn't remind me of the past

Even the Christmas tree, I hope this won't last

But how do I build up a cage again for these memories

In the tidal wave that has washed over my mind?

-Grey Elliot, a slam poem on PTSD 12/6/15