"Y/N, you about done in there? We have an interrogation to do in ten."
You hurried and finished brushing your hair, pulling it into a neat a right ponytail. "Yeah yeah, chill out James I'm coming."
Today you two had captured a very important and...interesting HPT. He's known to be "charming", daring, merciless, efficient, skilled, quick, some what smart (sometimes), immortal, and very very talkative. Yup, its Wade Wilson aka Deadpool.
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"Alright, this is how its going to go down so shut up and listen. Don't speak." You slam the folder on the counter, a stern look on your face. No smiling. Bucky, in the corner behind Wade, grunted, slightly shifting his weight to his other foot. There was no good cop or bad cop with you two, it was straight to the point.
Wade lifted his hands in mock surrender, causing the handcuffs to jingle. "Ooh scary. Can we get to the part where we make out?" He said casually.
Well, you were not expecting that and neither was Bucky because before you both realized, both of your jaws had dropped. "Excuse me?" You say, trying not to sound too confused and shocked.
Wade smirked. "Hey, I saw you checking me out when they were unarming me." He winks and leans back in a relaxed position. "Like what you see? I don't blame you. A lot of chicks," he gestures to all of him and starts nodding as if he knows he's all too glorious, "find this attractive."
You scoff and roll your eyes. "Um yeah suuure hot shot." Bucky clears his throat and pointedly looks at the folder. Right. Its time to get back on topic.
With a confident smirk, Wade swivels to look at Bucky and winks. "See what I mean? Even GI Joe princess thinks I'm smoking."
You and Bucky both roll your eyes. "Okay buddy let's get back to the topic..." Bucky suggests.
"The only topic that's important to me right now is showing that sweet slice of pie some moves." Wade bellows with an undeniably large amount of confidence. Then he turns to me with a 'seductive' look. "Honey, I got moves that make Magic Mike jealous."
"Umm..." You try to think of something to say but you are absolutely wordless. Wade is like a shark eating away the calm collective thinking way you have. Your thoughts are now muddled and you don't know what to do with him. He's unstoppable and impossible to break.
"Speechless? I have that effect on people." He continues. "I like to think that is my reason on this earth, to fill the world up with talk. The world wasn't meant to be silent!" He drags on, giving his speech whole heartily. It went on for minutes.
30 minutes later...
"And that's how I bombed China. The End."
Unbelievable. And no, Wade did not freakin bomb China...he had three bad chimichangas...plus two week old burritos. And we all know the outcome of that. You couldn't believe how incredibly hard this was. Wade was merciless.
"WAIT! I'm not done. I have another story when I ate dog food!"
You mentally screamed. But before you could physically scream Bucky stepped in. "Enough about your poop stories. We want to know about this guy you've been working for." Bucky then shoves the file in Wades face.
Wade squints at the photo for a moment and then smiles and loudly exclaims, "OH! Well why didn't you just say so Buckaroo! I would've told you that an hour ago!"
That's it. You could feel all the frustration bubbling over and Bucky must've sensed it because he looked back at you with wide eyes. But it was too late...
"IMGONNAKILLTHATMOTHERFUCKER!"
You tore across the room and before Bucky could hold you back, in order to protect Wade, you launched yourself. Of course in the perspective of a Deadpool you never saw an attractive female launching herself into a males lap a threat... "WHOOOHOOO FONDUE! Wait- OUCH OW OW OW YEEEEEEEEEOUCH!"
