42. VIHANG

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   "For the last time Vihu, I'm not calling Panchi to ask her about your kiss" Vartika yelled at me and hung up the call. I've been bugging Vartika to call Panchi and talk to her. It's been a whole week now that Panchi has been avoiding me.

I even asked Sid about her, but he didn't give me much details. I thought of calling her but then Vartika stopped me saying if Panchi wanted to call or text, she would have, and that I should leave her alone.

Even though kissing Panchi was the best moment of my life, I'm afraid it meant nothing to her. Maybe she just kissed me back only in the spur of the moment. Maybe she didn't feel what I felt. Every time I think of it, think of her, my heart, body, soul, craves more and more.

I want her to be with me, in my arms. There's something very different about this girl. Being with her, fastens my heartbeat. She makes me feel alive. I want to kiss her again, hell, I want to do things to her she could only imagine.

"Bhai!! What are you doing? Maa has called your name atleast five times" I heard Sid's voice from outside the door. I realised I wasn't decent enough to let him in, so I took a few deep breaths before answering. I told him I'll be out in five minutes and decided to take a quick shower.

After dinner I helped Maa clean up like always. This is the time when we tell each other about our days and talk. "Haven't seen Panchi around lately, is she alright?" maa suddenly asked me. I just told her that she's spending time with her dad. Maa read my face and didn't press the issue further.

Since Vartika wedding is closer, everyone is busy with the preparations. Maa and I gossiped about her in-laws for a little while before I came back to my room. I removed my sweatshirt and changed into my sleeping clothes. It's still early for my fucked up sleeping schedule so I decided to watch something on Netflix.

I unlocked my iPad when my phone buzzed. A voice at the back of my mind said it was Panchi so I immediately checked it. Ever since that day, whenever I get a call or message, I think it's her. For the past week, I've been glued to my phone like a desperate teenager.

'Hey...awake?' It was her this time, so I opened it andreplied.

'Alwaysawake for you little sparrow' I typed but then erased it fearing that she mayor may not like it. I replied with a simple 'hi' instead. She saw it almost instantly and started typing. I realisedI missed seeing her so without thinking I video called her. I had a feeling she'dreject the call but to my surprise she answered it.

"Hi" she said with a warm smile. I missed that smile so much. I assessed her carefully. She was wearing a pastel green coloured tank top and her hair was tied in a bun with a few loose stands covering parts of her face. Her eyes and nose were red, like she cried.

I felt a sharp pain in my heart, I wanted to hurt whoever made my little sparrow cry. I had a sudden urge to hold her in my arms and kiss till she's ok. "Give me five minutes" I said and hung up. Grabbing my keys, I ran down, started my car and drove all the way to her house.

It took me exactly seven and a half minutes to reach since the roads were empty. I called Panchi and asked her to come downstairs. Reluctantly, she agreed. Her hair were now open and instead of her tank top she was wearing an oversized t-shirt, paired with denim shorts.

"What are you doing here" she asked me opening the door. I gestured her to sit. She saw left and right to make sure no one was watching, as if I was some drug dealer. As soon as she sat I started the car and took a u turn. "Will you tell me what's going on Vihang" Panchi demanded. Somehow her authoritative tone turned me on. My original plan was just to her out for ice cream. But I changed my mind.

I stopped the car, unhooked my seatbelt, pulled her closer and placed my lips on hers. She parted her lips, allowing me to kiss her. We kissed for about two minutes before she pulled back. Panic settled in my chest. I cleared my throat before speaking. "We can't do this Vihang. I can't do this. Not to my best friend. I can't betray his trust" she said before I could speak. I decided not to interrupt her while she spoke.

None of us spoke after that. Her words lingered over us. The only sounds filling the silence were of the stray dogs barking somewhere near. Panchi was staring out of the window. I saw her and decided to tell her. "I love you Panchi" I said but she kept staring at out. I expected her to yell at me or atleast give some reaction but her silence scared me. I started the car and drove to her home. She didn't immediately opened the door. After she got out of the car she leaned forward and said "I can't love you Vihang. Everyone I love, leaves me eventually and I want you to stay" 

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