HER JOURNAL

DECEMBER 27, 2023

Year 2023 is about to end. Here I am trying to look back on all the things that I have been through this year. Did I achieve all of my new year's resolution? I'm sure I never did. Although I tried, and some of it - I was quite satisfied.

Though it wasn't perfect- nothing is. I started the year with a smile. 'Coz in my journal I wrote, don't let the day end without smiling. And everyday I keep on reminding myself to smile to get away from my b♪tch resting face. Smiling is kind of like therapy too, it tricks my brain to be happy even though I'm not.

One of my new year's resolutions is to sleep early. But guess what? I've been staying awake all night just getting lost in all my wishful thoughts. Sleep early. This is the hardest to do.

Control your temper. Trust me, I tried. This one is a bit easy. This year I learned patience too.

Don't hold grudges. Can't promise that I never did hold grudges to all of you. But since I keep on forgetting things, the next day I ain't mad at you. (But, know that I never forget things that I don't want to forget. This brain got some favoritism, I can't even understand)

My new year's resolution was too many to mention. Some of it, I'll just keep in my memory as long as I can recall it.

So far, this year was the most freeing. I was able to speak whenever I wanted without the fear of invalidation from others. Although sometimes, I still struggle with that aspect. Somehow, I was able to get out of my comfort zone. I met new people, I failed a couple of times, I broke some of my rules, I became closer to God. Year 2023 tested my patience, my integrity, and my perseverance. It was a battle of the last man standing. And I'm glad to see myself survive when the truth is I've chosen to give up multiple times already.

Still, I'm here getting ready for what the hell is waiting for me in the following years. Yet, one thing I'm certain of, I'll fall, I'll bleed, I'll breakdown, but I'll get up from the dead and I'll do it all the time.

RAIN