REBORN

CHAPTER IX

“ Health is not valued till sickness comes "

STUART’S POV 

Everything is  happening in a blink of a eye for me . I am not getting any time to process what is happening with me . Sudden meeting with Pearl and Liam was totally unexpected for me . After hearing to Pearl’s present condition , I was unable to focus on the my work . My mind was totally disturbed , there was lack of focus from me towards the work , which I generally don’t have .

Dee got  the hint of my disturbed mind so she suggested me to visit to counsellor in order to cure my self . I really needed someone’s help in order to cure me , so I made my mind to make the visit to the counsellor . In order to heal myself , I need to open myself to the counsellor . Opening up to the counsellor was hard for me , but I was having no other choice apart from this , so I opened up to the counsellor and told her everything , my past , my present everything .

With the guidance of the counsellor I even joined an yoga club and started doing some drawings as a part of my hobby . With this new adaptations also , I was unable to focus myself on the work , my mind still thinks about Pearl and her son , our son .

In the mean time , Dee wanted to help Pearl , so she offered her  the job of the waitress in my outlet and that too in the main restaurant where I generally stays . I somewhat figured out the reason of employing Pearl , she wanted to help Pearl  , but I didn’t understand why Dee allowed Pearl to work in the main restaurant .  I was having some uncomfortable while Pearl was working in the main outlet , everytime I tries to focus myself to the work , my eyes lingers on the cctv camera screen and I can see Pearl taking orders from the customers and serving the orders to them . Everytime , I try to focus , my mind gets filled with her thought and the focus about the work vanishes .

Literally speaking , all day thoughts about Pearl is running on my mind and I think I am loosing . Sometimes to bring my focus , I have to close the cctv screen .

Is I am again falling for her ? Is the love which I have for her is growing again ?

I don’t know the answer , but watching her around me makes my heart beat more faster than usual and I am facing the same kind of feelings which I faced during school time for her .

My heart and mind is totally messed up right now .
 
One week later ….

Seven days have passed by since Pearl started to work as a waitress in the main restaurant . We do cross paths in the work , she just avoids me or she just don’t want to mix professional and personal life .  She is a hard working lady and in these seven days she has grown a strong bonding with the other workers . Her jolly natures always attracts customers and I can sense customers are too happy with her service .

Present day ……

I was lying on the bed , restlessly . Today , one of my sleepless nights has started , I was habituated to it but today was something different .

I wake up from bed silently , so that it will not disturb Dee .  Yes , recently  after that nightmare , we started still to sleep together . I know my old nightmare and the memories again returned . Dee was not happy of letting me sleep alone , actually she cares for me very much . So she insisted on sleeping with me . After our mom’s death , she has taken the role of my mom .

So she insisted on sleeping with me which I cannot refuse .  Actually after that horrible incident when I was discharged from the hospital , some nights were there when I used to shout and scream in my sleep  , I even sweated profusely during the nights with fear .  I think it was panic attack . So the doctor suggested that someone should be with my me during my sleep . And from the childhood , Dee and I are sleeping together , so it wasn’t any problem for her to sleep with me . And those panic attacks again decided to make their return and haunt me .