50. capsize

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"i think about you and i'm filled with pride

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"i think about you and i'm filled with pride."

frenship, emily warren

— ✨ —

"i ate too much," felix groaned rolling around in the grass. the moon was up high, the stars shining through. they laid in changbins garden, all the rest having fallen asleep an hour before.

"me too," changbin groaned, turning to face the boy. "felix?"

felix hummed, looking towards him. "have you ever thought about the fact that your freckles look like the stars?"

felix smiled, turning a soft red shade. "shut up," he smiled, shoving changbins arm slightly. the older boy grabbed onto his hands, messing around the tips of his fingers. his heart fluttering.

"so have you found anyone remotely as gorgeous as draco malfoy?"

felix was caught off guard, because, changbin was a close runner up. "yeah."

"who?" changbin interlocked his fingers with felix. the youngest turned back onto his back, staring up at the sky, letting his own fingers relax against the others.

well, it wasn't like he could admit, to one of his closest friends, that he thought he was undoubtedly and utterly gorgeous. "you know, i've seen myself a couple times, in the mirror."

he smiled, tapping his fingers on the back of the others palm. he looked at changbin, who now laid with a dumb smile across his face. "you're so dumb."

"you're mean," felix smiled back, turning back again. "so you grew up in akrasia?"

changbin nodded, turning onto his back as well. their hands remained interlocked, something they both secretly wished would happen more often.

"are you going to visit your mom?" felix felt nervous. what if he wasn't supposed to ask about his mother? what if they weren't close enough for changbin to even consider telling him anything about his plans back home?

and when the boy didn't answer, he wanted to puke. because, if he had made changbin uncomfortable he wouldn't know how to fix it.

the hold on his hands tightened, "will you go with me?"

felix turned to look at changbin, who had already been staring at him. their eyes locked for a second, which was enough for felixs heart to start pattering harshly again. "of course. do you think she'll like me?"

"of course, who wouldn't?" the hold between their hands started to get hot, sweaty even. felix tried letting go, changbin tightening the grip he had on his hand.

so he wrapped his fingers within changbins again, opting to change the subject. "whos yeo?"

"yeosang? he's one of my friends, we went to a lot of classes together. he owns the flower field, and runs the cafe with another friend, yunho." clouds slowly started to engulf the sky, hiding the stars away. "i think you'll get along well. they're all only about a year or so older then us. and he's really nice, and pretty."

"you think he's pretty?" for some reason it stung felix's heart. he didn't have the right to feel the way he felt, whatever he felt.

"well, yeah, as a friend. i think you will too." relief. "we might even see san and wooyoung. i'm pretty close to them as well."

"you know a lot of people there."

"yeah, you know, they helped me through a lot of my feelings." changbin ran his fingers against the back of felixs palm, forming a small heart. "they give some good advice, they're always nice to have around."

"maybe i should text them, and let them know we're going, trips to akrasia don't happen too often."

— ✨ —

[july 24, 2023]

yall i started college.....

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