Everything I Wanted [BWWM]

Twenty-nine ~ Julia

I silently prayed that neither of them were still in the house as I pulled out my key. I didn't know what I would do if they were still in my home because I was still shaking with anger. Luckily, I didn't have to find out because I was welcomed with the emptiness of the house as I opened the door.

Tears rolled down my face as I stood frozen in the doorway. It wasn't until then that the pain really hit me and everything I had been through flashed through my eyes. A scream arose from within me as I let all the pain I felt out. I sunk on the floor and leaned my head against the door frame as I looked up at the ceiling. I knew I had wanted to be happy without having to depend on someone else, but that didn't make the betrayal hurt any less.

Just then my phone rang. I snorted when I saw Gloria's name on the screen because she had perfect timing. At first, I didn't want to answer the phone knowing I wasn't in the mood to chat. However, I knew if I didn't answer, she'd rush over to check on me. After all, she was one of the few who actually cared. So, I answered the phone and tried my best not to let my emotions be read through the phone. Yet, Gloria knew me very well. "What's wrong?" she asked with concern in her voice.

"Nothing," I lied as I stared out the door.

"Don't lie to me. I can hear it in your voice."

I sighed heavily as I wondered why I had even tried lying. She again was one of the few who knew me all too well to be able to hide how I was feeling. Well that and I sucked at lying. "I came home to Alex and Kayla kissing." I decided not to go into detail. It wasn't necessary.

"What!" I flinched pulling the phone away from my ear temporarily to try to spare myself from her yelling on the other end. "That bitch has gone too far this time and how dare Alex-"

"It's okay," I told her calmly as I put the phone back up to my ear. "I already kicked both of them out earlier." I scanned my front room still taking in the fact that they both listened to me. I, at least, expected Kayla to have put up a fight.

It was obvious Gloria was shocked because silence came from her end. "And she left without a fight?"

"Yup," was all I could mustered to say.

"Well, why don't I come over? We can watch a movie and have a girls night," Gloria suggested.

I knew she just wanted to comfort me and the idea did sound tempting. However, I just needed some time alone. "That sounds tempting. But, can I have a rain check?"

I could almost see the frown on Gloria's face. "I don't think it's the best idea for you to be alone right now." Her tone had shifted and I could tell she was concerned. Yet, I stood my ground.

"Actually that's exactly what I need to figure some things out."

"Julia-" she started to protest.

"Remember what you asked me when we were at my parents grave?"

"I asked you what did you want, but what does that do-"

"What I want is to happy without having to rely on someone else. My happiness has always been solely based on pleasing others. Yet, I never stopped to think about what I wanted or what makes me happy." Gloria grew quiet once more on the other end. I could sense her hesitation. So, I continued. "I just need a few days to figure some things out." Still, she said nothing. So I pressed a bit more. "Please," I asked her in a lower tone.