IronDad/SpiderSon One-shots

Voicemail Box 2.0

Third Person POV:
Word Count: 1,723

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"Hey, Happy! It's Peter again! I know I said that I was never going to send you one of these again, but I really missed sending you these, so I convinced Tony to stop listening in. He said you were disappointed that I wasn't sending them anymore. That's why I decided to start it back up! So, expect to hear from me again soon!"

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"So, exciting news! Do you remember how a couple months ago I told you how I had dinner with the random guy? Carl? Well, I had dinner with him again! He was in a bus that I prevented from crashing and he asked to take me out to a 'thank you' dinner. We hit up Delmont's. It was so fun! But, yeah, what else? Some little girl asked me if I was a professional cat rescuer. I told her I was so she asked me to save her cat. She was really sweet. Her cat, Pickles, not so much..."

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"I didn't patrol till super late tonight. How super late? Well... let's just say it was well past three in the morning when I got home. I know! I know! I can already hear May and Tony grilling me in my head, but I couldn't help it! When I got back from the lab with Tony, I just couldn't help it! I was getting ready for bed, but something was telling me to go out and patrol, so I did! I just might have gotten a little carried away. But, I'm glad I went out. There was this lady I walked home because she was scared. She told me thank you at least one-hundred times. I also was able to stop a high speed car chase. Pro-tip: Next time, I'll web the car before jumping out in front of it."

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"Howdy there. Not Peter, if ya can't tell. Name's Harley. Harley Keener. I was Tony's prodigy before good 'ole Peter Parker came in. Now I'm his co-prodigy. Kinda weird, but that's aye-okay. I like Peter. He's- hey, no, give me that- Happy? Oh my god I'm so sorry he took my phone and, HEY- Oh, sorry 'bout that. As I was saying, ya got yourself a good kid. Wait? What? I thought ya said he was dating yur aunt? He is? Then, yeah, yu're his kid. Ya got yarself a handful. Anyways, he was telling about these messages he sent ya and I just wanted to say howdy. Now, if yu'll 'scuse me, we gotta get back to working on this car."

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"Happy? Please answer the phone. Tony's- he's not answering and- I can't- I can't breathe. I think I'm dying and no one is answering! Please please please call me back."

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"I just wanted to say thanks. For calling me back, I mean. You, uh, you really helped me. *some silence* I'm sorry for freaking out like that, but I'm... really happy you helped me. So, thanks. Catch you later."

You have reached the voicemail box of: "Happy Hogan" Beep!

"Dude! Guess what? I got stabbed again! It was so different this time. I think Tony was mad about me not telling him last time because he added some protocol to the suit that made Karen tell F.R.I.D.A.Y. about it. He's so smart. And so cool. He's a great guy. I mean, wow. Hey, what are you- Hello? Who is this? It's- Oh. Oh okay. Fine, fine, you can have it back. But wrap it up. You're on bedrest right now- Happy? Hi, I'm back. Tony says I have to wrap it up, which is boring. He's- oh. He's giving me the look. I think he doesn't like that I called him boring. Yeah... yeah, I think I'll call you back later."