ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴏꜰ ɢᴏᴅ ᴘʟᴀʏ ɴɪᴄᴇ || ʙꜱᴅ

• 8 •

for the love of god play nice

Dazai: that was such a dramatic time

Chuuya: but mission shin soukoku accomplished

Nikolai: ah how i love romance! remember when i gave you a rose dos-kun?

Fyodor: i remember that well my dear, it was laced with poison

Nikolai: so you DO remember!

Tachihara: whaddafuck

Sigma: Tell me about it.

Kunikida: Are you not a romantic?

Sigma: Not when it involves death like those two lunatics, Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Dum try to kill each other in every possible way

Dazai: been there done that

Chuuya: yeah i vividly remember you planting a bomb under my car the night of our wedding before running away for 4 years

Yosano: oh!

Dazai: yeah lmao that was funny

Nikolai: OMG LETS DOUBLE DATE

Dazai: absolutely fucking not

Chuuya: you guys are literal nutcases that have tried to kill us on multiple occasions

Fyodor: when did you lose your fun streak?

Chuuya: when you joined this god forsaken group chat

Fyodor: ah poo

Tachihara: GIN I NEED HELP

Gin: What do you want

Tachihara: WHAT COLOUR BANDAGE FOR MY DATE???m

Gin: Pink you twink

Tachihara: i'm gonna pretend you didn't just say that and pick blue

Gin: Why ask

Tachihara: i wanted you to feel included because you're lonely

Gin: I have Higuchi

Akutagawa: Higuchi tell me you aren't banging my sister

Kyouka: Tell me you aren't banging my brother figure

Atsushi: it's more like the other way round but yknow

Haruno: WHAT

Tanizaki: CRYING AND THROWING UP

Dazai: I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF

Kunikida: Too much information Jesus Christ

Sigma: Don't pretend you haven't done the same thing.

Ranpo: HELP??? WHY SO MUCH INFORMATION

Poe: this is awful

Naomi: ATSUSHI IS A TOP???

Chuuya: what? short people can't top?

Dazai: i'm gonna shut my mouth for this one

Atsushi: CHUUYA TOPS???

Dazai: we SWITCH

Ranpo: LMAOOO I FEEL THAT

Poe: ranpo!

Ranpo: hehe

Gin: I've learned too much. My brother is a twink.

Akutagawa: I've learned my sister is fucking a girl and that my idol is a bottom

Dazai: SWITCH

Elise: Can you imagine being gay? Disgusting

Kenji: Why are you so homophobic?

Elise: Shut up cow boy

Kyouka: I'll kill you

Elise: Try me

Mori: Okay kids let's not fight, I'll buy you Robux!

Elise: I'm sorry Kyouka and Kenji

Kenji: We're sorry too

Fukuzawa: I have to do that to Ranpo sometimes too

Ranpo: okay let's not embarrass me in front of my boyfriend

Poe: i do the same thing sir

Ranpo: hush bae

ultimate babes threesome

Kunikida: Michizou why did you name this groupchat... that

Sigma: It's... interesting

Tachihara: because we're hot babes and we're poly

Kunikida: I mean fair enough

Sigma: When are we leaving for dinner Doppo?

Kunikida: I'll pick Michizou up first and then you at around 7 pm

Tachihara: i'm so excited i could pee myself

Sigma: Please don't

Tachihara: there won't be any stopping me if you show up in a suit

Kunikida: He has a point Sigma, I may have what Dazai calls a "gay panic" if I see you in a suit

Sigma: Nikolai took me clothes shopping and he was insistent on this white suit. He said I look like James Bond. Whoever that is.

Tachihara: foaming at the mouth, on my knees, begging for your juicy thighs

Sigma: My thighs?

Tachihara: i'm a thigh guy

Kunikida: Noted.

for the love of god play nice

Fukuzawa: I'm renting out a cinema screen so we can all meet up and watch a movie, what movie?

Dazai: whatever you do, don't ask Chuuya

Chuuya: THE BOY AND HIS DOG

Dazai: sigh. the same movie every time.

Chuuya: SHUT UP DAZAI I WANNA SEE DOGS

Atsushi: Homeward bound! It's got dogs AND cats

Akutagawa: I'll watch whatever Atsushi wants

Gin: Gross

Akutagawa: Shut up wench

Gin: Twink.

Akutagawa: Pussy eater

Gin: Dick sucker

Ranpo: you're both dumb af but you're not ready for that conversation

Naomi: We'd never be like that Junichiro

Tanizaki: precisely

Akutagawa: That's because we don't fuck each other pervs

Tanizaki: I DO NOT FUCK MY SISTER

Kouyou: bro.