Shot Throught the Heart

forty-one

The next few days were some of the hardest of my life. The first day of PT had me feeling like I was going through Ranger school all over again. The first three days were rough. Getting my muscles used to moving again basically felt like I was starting over. Even after getting shot didn't hurt this badly. Then came time to actually try to stand. I could barely stand on my own for a minute before I was grabbing onto my physical therapist so I wouldn't fall over.

We started to work on standing in place first, and when I felt comfortable, I took a few steps. I didn't get far in these first few days of PT, but it was better then sitting in bed with nothing to do. It took a few more days of long PT sessions before I was able to get out of bed on my own and make it over to the bathroom. Once Doctor Mayfield saw it with her own eyes, she cleared me to have most of the remaining tubes and drains removed from my body. The only ones that remained was the heart monitor leads and the IV in my arm for the many medications I was still on.

The day after everything came out of me, I got the morning off of PT to rest a bit. I thought it was a bit counter productive but I didn't argue with my therapist. Once again I woke up to a knock at the door. When I opened my eyes and took in the room I saw the person who I've been waiting to see since I've woken up. Morgan was standing in the doorway, her left arm in a sling but otherwise looking alright. Carefully I sat up in bed and pushed myself over to the edge. Once my legs were firmly on the ground, I pushed myself out of bed and took two steps in her direction when she was suddenly right in front of me with tears in her eyes.

With tender care, Morgan wrapped her arm around my waist and I walked into her waiting arms. My face made a home tucked in her neck and I brought my arms around her lower back and held her as closely as I could to my body without hurting myself in my process.

"Did you hear me say it back?" Morgan asked, her voice shaky with tears.

"What?" I asked and pulled away from her neck enough to be able to see her face.

"I said it back, I said it back to you so many times after the blast, waiting for you to say it again. But there was so much blood." Morgan said through sobs. I knew this was going to be hard, seeing Morgan for the first time afterwards. Now I understand why Annabelle waited until my doctor cleared me to move around some more before giving Morgan the chance to seek me out. If this happened when I first woke up, I would have barely been able to move let alone to remember what was happening.

Using some of my strength, I backed us both up towards my bed and carefully sat back down. Once I was on the bed, I looked up and Morgan's face and nodded towards the empty chair next to my bed. Morgan got the hint and sat down next to me but didn't let go of my hand.

"I'm sorry, I wish I did hear you. It would have made me felt a lot better then what I was actually feeling." I said and continued to rub my thumb over the back of her hand.

"How are you feeling?" Morgan asked as she tried to wipe away some of her tears.

"After the explosion, all I felt was pain. Worse then anything I've ever felt before. I had no sense of time. All I knew I wanted it to end. When I woke up for those few minutes here in the hospital, Annabelle was there and she told me where I was but that's about all I remember until I woke up again a few days later. Breathing sucks, walking is hard, but the pain isn't as bad as it was before. How is your arm?" I asked.

"I'm fine, a simple surgery to just repair some muscle damage and now I'm in this sling for another two weeks." Morgan answered.

"Good, god I can't wait to go home, all I want to do right now is curl up on the couch with you and not move for days." I said and sighed.