In My Shoes | The Music Freaks AU | A Jailey Fanfiction

Chapter 1-Leaving it all Behind

♡Hailey♡

When I was younger I remember I would have given anything to live in L.A.

I dreamed about singing on a stage in front of thousands of people chanting my name. Back then, I dreamed about becoming a famous singer. I thought about touring the country, giving autographs, and doing photoshoots.

I wasn't ever informed about the courage, dedication, and hard work it took to be famous. I wasn't informed about how much time it took to gain those millions of fans or the money needed to rent out huge stadiums.

I thought you would write a song, release it, and wake up the next morning on top of the world.

I didn't know how hard it was, and how much time it took to write a song you're happy with. I didn't know how much courage it took to put yourself out there.

I didn't think about the haters or the people who could hurt me, both emotionally and physically. I only thought about standing in the spotlight, with thousands of people around me who wanted to hear my voice.

I clearly don't think that way anymore. I was six at the time.

Being six was nice. I was so oblivious. I didn't notice my imperfections. I didn't worry about how much I ate or dressed. I didn't worry about what other people thought of me.

I only worried about myself, my family, and my small group of friends. In some ways, kids are more intelligent than teens or adults. Kids are oblivious of course. As they like to say "Ignorance is bliss".

They're not wrong there.

The point is, when I was younger I believed my life was drawn out specifically, and I was meant to get from point A to point B, and do great things. I didn't worry about the bad and focused on only the good. I would have given anything to live in L.A., the city of celebrities and stars.

So that's precisely why I can't figure out why I'm so upset standing outside of my new house, located here, in the home of my dreams. 

Los Angeles, California to be specific.

When my dad first proposed the idea it was a joke. My stepmother, Shannon, laughed along with him. She said she'd dreamed of living in California her whole life, but it was impossible. The thought of leaving my home at the time (Minnesota) made me sick. 

I'd grown up there the entirety of my life, and even though I had some bad memories, that didn't make me want to move. 

Eventually, the idea started becoming more of a reality and less of a joke. Then one day, my dad announced that he and Shannon were considering moving. There was a job offer there, and it would pay double my dad's current salary. 

My dad applied, and two weeks later, they told him he got the job. 

Long story short, here I am. 

Whoopee.

Here's what they don't mention in the magazines. They don't mention the fact that everything costs five times more than normal, and that outside of Beverly Hills, the place looks like a dump. 

I'm usually ecstatic to get home, but today, I'm just not in the mood. I know as soon as I walk in Bethany will be asking me to help her with the guitar, my stepmother will be asking for my help with chores, or my dad will start drilling me about the day. 

I'm usually happy to help, but after being out of the house all day, working at a large bookstore a few blocks from my house, I'm not exactly up for more "work".

I shove my keys back in my left pocket and spin around. I bend down, and throw my backpack off my shoulder, digging for something near the bottom. I grope around for a bit until I feel it graze my fingertips.

Quickly, I snatch the book and pull it out. I examine the cover for a moment, tracing my fingers against the twirling font on the front. I flip it open to where I left off, and immediately my eyes begin to scan the page.

I shift my attention momentarily from the book to my backpack, and zip it closed, throwing it over my shoulder. I focus my attention back on the book as I flip a page, and my eyes immediately absorb the next few sentences.

I've only been in California for a few months, but I've memorized the path to the dandelion field near my house. I live in a suburban neighborhood, but if you walk for a bit, it simmers out into almost the middle of nowhere. the difference, however, is that the grass and trees are vibrant and healthy, unlike most places that are "in the middle of nowhere".

I originally discovered the field a few weeks after we moved here. I had been stuck in the house and decided to take a walk. I just followed the road until it turned to dirt, and I noticed that there was a group of trees all surrounding one area.

Me being me, I decided to check it out.

When I brushed through about 5 layers of shrubbery, I stumbled out into a field. I was immediately awe-struck and took a few seconds to fully process what I was seeing.

It seriously looked like something out of the books I read. It was completely surrounded by trees, bushes, and vines, and It looked like it might go on for almost a mile. The best part is, in front of me, it looked like there could be thousands of dandelions. There was no sign of civilization anywhere near me, and I immediately fell in love with it.

I read for a few hours that the first day, sprawled out in the grass. The wind was soft and calming, and the air smelled like summer. I even sang a bit. I only ever did that in private. I almost never did anymore, especially after what he said, and after what had happened.

I promised myself silently that I wouldn't tell anyone about the heaven-on-earth I had discovered. I had already paid the price for trusting people in past, and I wouldn't let myself do it again.

Without tearing my eyes from the book, I stand up and head off toward my safe haven, clutching the book in my hands.

I can't let my walls down. Even for just a second.

The last time I did, it ruined my life.