DONATUS- The Fate Of The Vampire Prince (VampireXwitch)

Chapter Thirty-Four- Darkened Eyes

Warning! Reader's discretion is advised if you are sensitive to physical or sexual violence.
Enjoy.

A'Miza

"You should be elated to know that the child is growing well on track" Kelsey, one of the maids uttered as she dusted the cabinets in my room. She hummed as she cleaned. I try not to restart. When since did my pregnancy become everyone else's business?

Oh... he or she is the next prince or princess. I keep forgetting. Then, it makes sense why everyone looks at me as though I were some delicate flower. I can't say it isn't too much, because it is. Sometimes I don't want to be seen. I feel a deep sense of loneliness...a sadness I can't fully describe since I've come back from the ancestral realm. My birth mother's words-how she was adamant that Siane wasn't done with. She was adamant that this baby was doomed. That I was doomed. It all seemed so final...like there was nothing I could do to change any of it. Z came back from Imperium in one piece, and so did Iminan. They've both been keeping their distance from me and even though I'm angry at Z, still. I miss him. Carrying his child wasn't making it any easier for me either.

The relief I felt when I saw the car pulling in...the fretting when they had left. If I told anyone that I no longer loved him even after all he's done, I'd be lying. It was complicated and fucked up. But, he's still the same Zurich who saved my life, the same one who risked his life to come back on Winone to see that I was okay after he was banned. The same one who risk his life to take me to Quintin Hill, and the same one who saved me from his father, and went into hiding with my parents and me for months. Hunting for us, protecting us...all while making himself a wanted man in the process. He doesn't even know of the sacrifice I've made for him, and he's done all this for me, anything.

He was right...I knew how he felt for me. But he's never said it to me... all he's done up to now is run from me and so things he knows will push me away all because he can't handle my humanness. He can't handle it at all.

And I wish there was something I could do...that I could have done to give him some peace with that. And I also knew they, either way, I'd be dead soon...so being with him now will only make things worse. But..the stupid in me missed him. Everyday. I dropped my fork on my plate as I suddenly felt ill. I tried to keep calm as I walked inside the bathroom, past Kelsey and closed the door behind me. I threw up everything I just ate into the toilet and stayed hunched over waiting for any more throwup. Ugh. The smell made it worse.

"Miss McNeal do you need any aid?" Kelsey asked from the door. "I could get someone for you."

"No thanks, I can handle throwing up without assistance," I rolled my eyes as I made my way to the sink. I knew they were all only trying to make this easier for me, but two months in I can only see it getting worse. Carrying a hybrid was more challenging they say. Even more so a royal. They were a lot stronger than average vampires, so their offspring were just the same. Oh fuck, at what point does it grow legs and arms and start to kickbox me with that strength? Oh hell!

I stood in front of the sink and brushed my teeth trying not to look at myself in the mirror. I knew I didn't look my best these days and I couldn't keep anything down and am losing weight. I felt weak. It was the last thing I needed to be feeling right now. Not right now... Not when I have the world against me, my own body fighting against me, and a hybrid growing inside me. I feel a deep sense of aloneness like no one could ever understand my pains. Sad may be the only word I can think of to explain it. I felt like I just wanted to go far away.

Zurich

"Speak, woman, you've come here to watch me get dressed or what?" I sighed, annoyedly at Kelsey with my back turned to her whilst I slipped into my black leather pants. I glance up at myself in the mirror. I looked like a mess. I need blood. I haven't drunk any in a while. I needed to feed...punishing myself like this needed to end. I need to get my strength back. You need to get her back. Nah. She's the last thing I needed to be thinking about...yet here I am collecting information from Kelsey.