quicksand (Dazai X Reader)

meeting

It was day 15 when she woke up.

She suddenly opened her eyes and found herself looking at a white ceiling, birds chirping in the background. She let out a loud breath she didn't even know was holding in. She looked at the IV on her hand, 'well at least i'm not dead', she thought.

"Morning sleeping beauty" a voice echoed in the room.

A man in a sand colored trench coat with a goofy smile was standing in the door frame, just locking eyes with the young woman while she just looked back with a confused expression on her face.

"Oooh, pretty boy Lucifer, do you happen to know where I am?" She said in a husky voice, realizing she was kind of thirsty so she started to look around to see if there was a glass of water somewhere.

"I do actually, you are in the Armed Detective Agency, and my name it's not Lucifer, it's Dazai Osamu", he said as he handed her a water bottle.

She took it and drank it in one go. Then she looked at him again. Dark brown wavy hair, kinda long, but not that long, shaggy hairstyle, brown eyes on a boyish face, tall but kind of scrawny to be a detective, she couldn't deny he was handsome, in a devilish kind of way.

'He probably gets away with a lot of things with those looks' she thought.

"I think Lucifer suits you better, has more of a kick, don't you think?" She responded after taking a deep breath as if she had forgotten how to breathe.

"Maybe I could get it changed, I don't have a lot going on today" he played along, enjoying the company and getting to know the girl who threatened to pierce his neck with a piece of plastic. He laughed unconsciously.

"What's so funny?" She asked confused while laying back down on the bed, 'It's pretty comfortable' she thought while trying to figure out the man in front of her.

"Nothing, I was just thinking how different you look without being covered in blood half naked and holding a piece of plastic to my throat" he said, emphasizing the word plastic, now everything seemed kind of bizarre, but that was his line of work.

She looked embarrassed, she hasn't forgotten about what happened it just kind of slipped her mind that it just happened, it felt like it was a distant dream, like when you remembered parts of your childhood and your memories seem distorted and you question yourself if it was a real childhood memory or if you dreamt it or made it up.

"Well, that was all I had in hand! Next time I'll do better, get a pair of scissors or even a small knife, how does that sound?" She tried to cover her embarrassment by joking around, she also pulled the sheets up as if she was cold, making Dazai laugh.

"Oh that sounds lovely! You know what sounds even better?" He started to get closer to the bed, sitting on the edge of it and leaning into her till he was close to her ear, she just stayed there, unmoving, perfectly still, she felt neither fear nor panic, she felt weirdly calm.

"If you would commit a double suicide with me? What do you say pretty eyes?" He whispered in her ear slowly, then he sat back up to see her expression, and he was surprised to see her thinking, she looked like she was in really deep thought

'Is she actually considering it?' He thought to himself.

"I kind of want to say yes, but if I'm alive it probably means my parents know where I am and that I am alive after thinking that I was dead or something" she said in a low tone almost like a whisper while she sat up, and proceed to look at her hands holding the sheets, "and I don't really wanna make my mom sad, again, at least for now" she added now looking at him.

"Maybe later" she ultimately responded to his proposal with a soft smile.

He just looked at her kind of disappointed and also kind of intrigued, 'she is absolutely being honest' he thought.

"It's a promise then, if you ever feel like dying just tell me, and we'll depart this absolute horror show that is life!" Dazai said dramatically, holding one hand to his forehead and leaning back a little, he then stood up and faced the window by her bed.

"Don't you wanna know what happened with the girls?" He asked without looking at her.

"Of course, I just figured you would tell me eventually, and I just woke up so a little chit chat is nice" she answered, turning to face him. He looked at her once and turned to the window again.

"Well, they were rescued, not only those four and you, a whole lot more! It was a full operation done by yours truly~" he sang the last word and turned to see her reaction, she was looking at him with a troubled expression, no one wants to hear there were a lot more girls being held hostage.

"Everyone is safe, reunited with their family, very sappy, even you! But you have been asleep for a while, 15 days to be exact" he informed the young woman and looked at her again to see her reaction.

She just locked eyes with him and held her gaze.

"That's a long ass nap" was all she responded with an unreadable expression on her face.

"It is." he said.

There was a long silence between them, she, once again, laid down and pulled the sheets so they were covering half her face, only leaving her eyes out and staring at the ceiling. Dazai turned to the window and kept looking straight ahead. The air felt kind of tense but in an awkward way, not necessarily hostile.

"So, when can I go home?", the girl in the bed asked, still looking up at the ceiling.

"You can't go home for a while, I'm sorry", Dazai said in a soft voice, thinking a cloud looked like a cat.

"Are you?" She said.

Was he? He hadn't thought about that, he said the thing people usually say.

"Not really, it's just what people say when they tell a person something they don't wanna hear, I guess" he answered truthfully, they kept avoiding each other's gaze.

"You don't have to say things you don't mean to me, I'm a big girl, I can handle it" she chuckled sadly. "So what's my sentence chief?" She asked in a sad tone.

He turned around so quickly the woman in bed faced him because she thought his head had snapped. And there he was now at the side of her bed again taking her hands out of the covers to hold them both in his.

"Two years probation and community service! Which I may add, you will be doing in the Agency! We haven't really specified what role you will be playing here but you are a psychologist you should be useful somehow, oh, we are also gonna provide you with an apartment, and you will be paid don't worry!" He almost screamed at her face with a crazy grin plastered on his lips.

'How did he changed expresions and tone so fast, its almost natural, what the fuck is wrong with this guy' she thought to herself, she was beyond frightening of everything, of him, the situation, she was playing nice because that's the best way to go when you dont know what the fuck is going on, but she... just wanted to cry.

"Oh...is that's so...um well thanks I guess" was all she could say.

He let go of her hands, he noticed she was scared and confused but it was kind of amusing to see her reactions, she was being surprisingly clam, 'probably from shock' he thought, he still was entertained tho, that's why he came early to the office, before all his coworkers, and also planned for her parents to be out doing some political errands at the embassy.

He wanted to be the first one to talk to her when she woke up, he wanted to be the first person she would see. He had this need to be entertained, to fill the void of boredom that gripps his soul, he needs to find some kind of meaning, and if he can't, he will at least have a good time.

"Well, I'll let you rest, your parents will be here soon, you'll also get to know everyone in the Agency, if you need anything just give me a shout", he said as he got up quickly and went through the door. As soon as he closed it he heard a soft sob, he heard her start to cry silently, and she kept crying for a while.