fatal love

chapter 124

"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO RECRUIT MY BROTHER?"

Sirius stormed into Dumbledore's office as soon as the Ancient Runes lesson was over. The old wizard looked up calmly from his desk, surveying Sirius through his half-moon spectacles.

"Language, Mr Black," he chided softly.

Sirius strode over, slamming both his hands down on the desk. "He's not going to do it," he hissed. "I'm not letting him go through what I went through."

Dumbledore sighed. "I don't want him to go through anything, Sirius," he said sincerely. "I promise, I won't ask him to do more than tell me whatever he hears."

"Well, you aren't going to get what you want," Sirius said bluntly. "He's the spawn of my parents, he'd never do anything to help our side."

"Maybe you could convince him. You're his older brother, he looks up to you, you could show him reason."

Sirius slumped, sitting down opposite the headmaster. "No," he muttered, "he's got no respect for me now I'm not the Heir anymore."

Dumbledore tilted his head. "Respect and love, Sirius, are not the same thing."

"Whatever," Sirius snorted tiredly. Respect was more important, especially to a Black, but he didn't expect Dumbledore to understand that. "You can give me meaningless platitudes all you like, it doesn't change the fact that Reggie's a blood-purist. I hated being your spy, but at least I thought I was doing the right thing, that's why I did it. He wouldn't."

"I think," Dumbledore said slowly, "that we know each other well enough, by now, to talk to each other plainly. Would you agree?"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Sure."

"Your brother's beliefs are certainly abhorrent, but they have been taught, which means they can also be untaught."

"And then he can work for you," Sirius said sarcastically.

"Then he can make his own decisions about what he wants to do with his life," Dumbledore replied. "But I want you to try, Sirius, and see if you can get through to him."

"Why should I do that to my brother? He's safe, at the moment. Doing what you want will only put him in danger."

"He'll always be in danger, Sirius," Dumbledore said gravely, "and he's going down a dark path at the moment. Do you really think Voldemort won't demand far more from him than what I would ever request?"

"Reg is a blood-purist, but he's not a Death Eater," Sirius shot back in anger. "He wouldn't ever want to hurt anyone. He's... he's softer, than the rest of us."

Dumbledore smiled sympathetically. "He'll have to pick a side sooner or later. Standing on the sidelines won't be an option for him, not as the Heir to the House of Black. I just need you to show him there's a choice, and try to convince him to make the right one."

"I... I can't," Sirius sighed. "I- I'll do whatever it takes to stop Voldemort, Professor. I'd die if I had to, I'll do whatever you ask me to, and I think you know that, I think I've proven that. But you- you let me get tortured, for years, and did nothing. I almost got myself killed for you, and then never heard a word from you after I left that house. Nothing."

Dumbledore lowered his head, and Sirius thought, perhaps, he looked shameful.

"And it's- look, it's fine, okay?" Sirius continued, swallowing. "You needed me there, I get why it happened the way it did, why it had to be that way. And I'd do it again. But I can't put Reg in that position. I can't trust you to help him if he were in trouble."

Dumbledore nodded, looking Sirius in the eyes. "I am sorry, Sirius," he said quietly. "I never wanted you in that position, and the fact you were kept there, it will always haunt me."