Ziphozethu

53

"Ma, pack your bags and leave." Moses said calmly. "No." She replied. "Leave ma. If I have to ask again I'll have security escort you out. Leave." I was standing there shaking like a helpless puppy. In the beginning I thought I was playing them. I thought I had them fooled and it turns out I was just a pawn in someone else's game.

"Moses, you can't throw me out. I'm your mother." I started to walk away because I didn't want to hear what she would have to say. I have to admit that I was scared Moses would take her back. I was terrified of that.

"Mamakhe, please." I couldn't keep it in anymore. I started crying. "Mamakhe." He grabbed me and hugged me. "She's gone. She's gone. I'm never going to let anyone hurt you again. I promise and this time I'm keeping my promise." I held onto his shirt for dear life.

"Come, let's go." He walked me up to my room and tucked me into bed. He switched the light off but I didn't want him to leave. "Please stay." I felt stupid. For some reason I was scared. I didn't want him to leave. "What?" He sounded shocked. "Stay." I repeated and he didn't hesitate. He got in bed with me and held me. "Tighter. Hold me tighter." He did as I said and my racing heartbeat finally slowed down. He held onto me the whole night and even though I didn't sleep at all I felt safe for the first time in forever.

"Good morning, Mamakhe. You didn't sleep at all last night. Are you going to sleep in?" I shook my head. "Thank you." I said looking up at him. I couldn't help it. I was in love with this man. Even after everything I was still in love with him. "For what?" He looked confused. "For staying with me." He placed a kiss on my forehead. "Thank you for letting me stay."

We eventually got out of bed and got ready for the day. I hid the bags under my eyes with some makeup because his brother was still here. "Mamakhe, are you done? Breakfast is about to be served." I nodded and walked downstairs with him. During breakfast Noah kept on appologising for their mother but I didn't really care.

"The reason we came here was to share some good news. I'm expanding the supermarket. We've got two new locations and we're starting to build next month. The farms are thriving and I've just managed to aquire more land. It's not a lot but I got it for next to nothing." Everyone was happy and congratulated him.

After breakfast I made myself scarce. I didn't want to deal with people. Especially after what those people saw the day before. "MaZulu! MaZulu I know you're in here!" I was sitting in a corner in my closet. I didn't feel like dealing with Nozipho. She always wants me to talk about my emotions. It was starting to get irritating.

"Really?" I heard when my closet door went open. "This is what we do now? We sit in closets? Come on. Moses and Noah started a fire and Nomzamo is in the kitchen trying to make salads to go with the meat. She can't find anything and you know I never step foot in the kitchen so I don't know where anything is either." I was trying to figure out if they needed my help or if she was just trying to get me out of my room.

"Where's the maid?" She rolled her eyes at me. "Really? This is what you want to do with the rest of your life? Sit in a closet and mope around?" I rolled my eyes but got up anyway. "What is she looking for?" She smiled and tried to hide it. "I don't know. Bowls, vegetables probably, I stopped listening after I heard something about potatoes. You know I have no interest in these sorts of things." I joined them in the kitchen and helped Nomzamo make a whole bunch of sides and salads that nobody was going eat.

"MaZulu, how did you and Moses meet?" She asked after telling the romantic story of her love life. Apparently she met Noah in highschool and he used to write her poems. They got married right afterwards. "We met at my old job." I said because I was not in the mood for this. "There has to be more to it. Come on, don't hold back." I just shrugged. "We met at my old job, I was a waitress. He was there late and my boss told me to get rid of him. Now we're here in his house making him salads."

I didn't mean to sound rude it just came out that way. I could tell I hurt her feelings and she was only trying to be nice. "You should've left me in the closet." I told MaDlamini and stormed off to the wine cellar. I grabbed a bottle and went up to my room. I sat on the floor and drank it.

"MaZulu, will you be joining..." Moses stopped talking when he saw me on the floor trying to suck the last drop of wine out of the bottle. "Moses!" I yelled joyfully. I was drunk and everything was funny to me. "Did you know if your mother didn't insist on the wedding I wouldn't have been here right now?" I said trying to get up but failing. "Mamakhe this needs to stop." I laughed at him. "Why? Because you said so? Well I like it. Moses?"

He just hummed in response. "You should've left me there." He finally came to help me up. "Where Mamakhe?" I sat on the bed and held his hands. "In that shack. The minute your mother came to get you you should've left me there. You should've left me there to die. My whole life I knew I would probably end up starving to death in the shack. You should've let me." He was looking me up and down almost like he didn't recognize me.

"I think about it all the time now."
"What?"
"Dying. I'm not supposed to be here Moses. I'm only here because your mother hated your wife. Your actual wife. The one that knows about business, fashion, the one that went through so much bullshit just so you can have children. I'm not supposed to be here Moses. I'm supposed to be rotting in that shack where nobody would ever find me because the smell of my rotting corpse would just blend in with all the other bad smells. You should've left me there to die. I wish you left me there to die."

"Mamakhe, no. Please don't say all of this. You're exactly where you're supposed to be." I shook my head and wiped his tears after he fell to his knees. "Don't cry. I don't like seeing you cry. I want you to be happy. You'll be happy when I'm gone."

"Mamakhe stop. Please stop." He cried in with his face in my lap. "Shh, don't cry. Don't cry Moses. I'll be fine. You'll be fine."

"Why are you talking like this?" I could feel it. I was starting to see stars. "Because I'm going home. I'm going. Make sure you Buhle and Sicelo know how much I love them." His head jerked up. "Mamakhe what did you do?!"
"I love you, Baba." I was slowly slipping away. "Zethu! What did you take?! Answer me!"
"I love you but I wasn't meant to be here. I wasn't meant to be happy. Promise me you'll be happy, Baba."
"Zethu, please!" I laid down on the bed. My eyes were becoming heavy.
"Zethu, what did you take!? Someone call an ambulance! Help!" I heard heavy footsteps running to my door.
"Mamakhe, please. Please, I'm begging you. Stay with me. Don't just stand there! Call a damn ambulance!"
"Baba."
"Mamakhe."
"I love you."
"I love you too. Please stay with me. Keep your eyes open. Please Mamakhe I'm begging you. Please! Zethu! Keep your eyes open! Please keep them open!"

"I love you." I said and everything faded to black.