Plus size problems

Chapter nineteen

Before I start I would like to say a thank you to chocoholic_28 thanks for discovering my story.

Danny's POV

Another misery of a day, bleak, worthless, misguiding day. After losing Ana to my stupidity I'm a broken man. It's been rough these past couple of weeks. It's like getting attached to something and then it disappearing without a word. After considering to drink myself under the table I thought of her. I always do. She's my world, my centre shifts when she's near me. I can't believe I screwed everything up because I thought that she's wouldn't want to wait for me at all. Maybe she would have. Maybe this is just me being a stupid kid who wants what's in the moment and not realising that I've hurt the one person who I didn't want to. I do come to a decision, I need a night away from the studio, away from gigs, girls, booze and music. But what I really want to do is be with Ana. After everything my brother put her through those many years ago, he must seem like a fucking puppy dog now. Why am I prick.

I've spent most of my week with my head in my pillow and my body incapable of eating and cleaning. At round 11 o'clock on Tuesday night, Adam from the band walked in and told me to get my misery arse up and on stage. To be fair though, fame and rock n roll doesn't seem that appealing anymore. It seems darkened by my solitude. It seems plain and non-understanding. They says that money and fame doesn't buy us happiness. Are they right there. It doesn't do anything that I expected. When I was told that it was a heads up for us going away, I was joyful but fearful. I didn't want to go without Ana. When she said that she would wait for me I was over the moon. It's only now I realise that I basically told her that I was too good for her and that I need to be with people who are more hip with me. But Ana was hip with me. I can imagine it now, she's probably over thinking things in that gorgeous head of hers. Damn. What Have I done. I've gave up my happiness for a dirty stage and smelly toilets with people trying to find vein.

Today is the new gig near home. All I want to do is run to the van and drive home. The lads are counting on me though. God, what I wouldn't give to go back and say no. I mean I was perfectly happy with my gym job. I rocked in at an reasonable time. I helped people gain their goals and most of all I saw Ana. I was with her eve. When I was at work. I wish I never found fame. I don't want it at all. All I want it her. I'm pulled out of my train of thought by Karen.

"Oh my god what you doing here girl" I said trying to hid my sadness.

"I just came to see how you are doing" she asks.

"I'm doing great more then great" I said lying my ass off.

Just as she is about to respond to my response, George is calling me up to the stage to do a rehearsal. I tell him that we will be doing pieces first. It was a song about Ana and me. The lads got everything together and I made sure that I was prepared for this. When I was ready I pulled the first string.

I'm gonna pick up the pieces and build a Lego house
If things go wrong we can knock it down
My three words have two meanings
But there's only one thing on my mind
It's all for you ooh

And it's dark on a cold December
but I've got you to keep me warm
If your broke I'll mend you
and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that raging on now

I'm out of touch
I'm out of love
I'll pick you up when you get down
And out of all theses things I've done
I think I love you better now
I'm out of sight
I'm out of Mind
I'll do it all for you in time
And out of all these things I've done
I think I love you better now

When the song finishes, I jump from the stage and Karen literally attacks me with words.

"I know you broke it off with Ana" she said.

"Who told you" I ask.

"I saw Ana at work and she looked a mess, so I asked Callum if she was ok" she said picking up a leaflet by the stage.

"How would Callum know if she's ok" I say confused.

"Well, he's been spending nearly all his time over there. He's been helping her out with the baby and everything" she says presumptuously.

"Baby. Who's pregnant" I say baffled.

"Ana is" she whispers.

"What" I barely say.

"Yeah didn't you know, she said she would ring you and tell you. But I guess she didn't have to since you ended it with her" she says.

"I didn't end it with her, that's what she was going to tell me" I say, grabbing my coat and heading out.

I literally run to the van and ask George and Adam to get everything out so I can go. They tell me to quit pissing about, we have a show to do. Karen is now by the door looking at me.

"Well I don't care, the woman I love is carrying my baby. So piss off and get the hell out" I shout.

When I get in the car, I start up the engine and take off. I realise then that Karen could be lying. So I pull over and dial a number.

"Jess" I say.

After Jess has made it quite clear that I am the father and a fuck up at one. I come up with a plan that will make her take me back. She has too. She's all that life is to me and now that we are having a baby together just makes it more perfect and realistic. I know what I have to do, it's be with her and our child.