Silence Is His Favourite Song

Chapter 34

Max's pov

I woke up by 5am looking at the dark sky outside.

I thought about everything that's happened and my decision to disappear and I realized that if I followed through now, they'd be hurt and they'd blame themselves and I didn't want that. So I decided to put it off until an ideal moment where I could disappear without them necessarily being too affected by it

With that thought in mind I stayed in bed for a while watching the sun peeking through the curtains and I decided to get up and get dressed, after which I took two painkillers and two Xanax pills and as a result I felt loopy but I still managed to walk out my front door

Roxy was waiting for me outside and I raised a brow

"I figured you'd either be in too much pain or on too many pills to drive yourself to school, and judging from your appearance, the latter seems to be the case " Roxy rolled her eyes but I could see the hurt she was hiding

I got in her car and we made our way to school

I looked at her as she drove, her grip on the wheel was so tight that her knuckles were white and I sighed

"Why are you so tense? "

"I'm not, why would you think I'm tense? " she said quickly

She was trying to play it down but it was obvious something was bothering her

"Well for starters, you're trying to squeeze the steering wheel to death " I stated and her grip on the wheel loosened instantly

"I'm worried " she admitted, sighing

"About what? "

"You "

I raised a brow at that

"And why is that? " I asked

"Because I feel like I'm losing you, we all do. Ever since you and Veronica broke up, you've changed. It's like the guy we once knew is fading away. " she trailed off

I frowned, they still couldn't understand

"That guy is dead, and he's not coming back " I said quietly, looking out the window

The car screeched to a halt

"Stop saying that! I hurts just hearing you say that! Why can't you just...."

"Just what Roxy? Get over her? I wish I could but it's not happening. She was everything to me! She didn't mean the world to me, she WAS my damn world! You don't get it, I loved her with everything I had and everything I am and it still wasn't enough. I wasn't enough. Sometimes I think if I hadn't fallen for her things would be different but I know if I could turn back time I wouldn't change a damn thing, she's perfect and I'm not, she deserves much better than me and that's why I'm stepping away. She doesn't need me around blocking her happiness. She's better off without me.... you all are " I clenched my fists

Roxy turned to me

"What does that mean? " she asked with narrowed eyes

I shook my head and exited her car and walked into school

The first thing I noticed was that the guys all looked tense and Jess looked worried. Veronica looked scared and I knew something was wrong

Once we joined them I didn't waste time

"What's wrong? " I asked

"Nothing " Veronica replied quickly earning a snort from me

"Look angel, don't give me that bullshit. Something's wrong, so tell me what it is " I said with seriousness

Noah shrugged
"He'll find out eventually princess, we might as well tell him "

She sighed and shook her head

"Fine then, I'll find out myself. " I snapped frowning and walked away from them

I went to class and even though I was paying attention, my mind never left that incident

***********

At lunch, I'd decided to sit with them. That was until they all still decided to hide whatever it was they were hiding from me. Even Roxy seemed to know

At that point I stood up and walked out of the cafeteria

I went to the bathroom and took my pain meds and I went to my locker to get some stuff for the next class when I saw a note that must've been slipped through the vents

Curious, I opened it and after reading it I got even more pissed

Better watch your back, she may not be yours anymore, but you're still not safe. No one takes what's mine and gets away with it. Your punishment will be much more severe, so better watch your back, and the backs of your so called friends.
No matter how beautiful sky blue is, at the end of the day, red will always be drained out of it.

I ripped up the note and threw it away

"Bullshit " I muttered as I went to my next class

The rest of the day was spent ignoring the others and focusing on my classes. I couldn't afford to fail

After school, I waited for Roxy by her car and a few minutes later I saw her coming towards me in the company of the others

I frowned as they got closer, not knowing what they could possibly want then I realized they probably had something to talk about with Roxy so I made to enter the car but Roxy stopped me by grabbing my arm, also the car was locked so.....yeah

"We want to tell you what's happening " she explained when I gave her a questioning look

"Fuck off, I already know what's happening " I snapped

"Max... " Veronica said

"Don't even start. You didn't trust me to tell me that Chad is threatening you? Fine. Since you so obviously don't want me in your business I'll stay out of it. Roxy open the damn door, I'm tired of this shit and I need my meds " the last part was a lie because I'd just taken them not too long ago but they didn't have to know

Roxy sighed and unlocked the car and I got in waiting for Roxy who spent a good couple minutes talking with the others until eventually she got in and we made our way to my house and I got out and simply waved before going inside

I was legit pissed at the fact that she didn't want me knowing anything but then I remembered what had happened between us and I felt pain in my soul.

I'd lost her...

That's why

I drank until I passed out on my bed that night