Finding Them (Review Thirty)

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Finding Them
By: savvysoul_37

Reviewer: The_Scarlet_Writer

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Cover/title: 9/10

- At first glance, the title is interesting; it kind of gives off some mysterious vibes.

- I think the cover is really pretty, very aesthetic too.

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Blurb: 8/10

- I think it's nice and it made me curious to find out more about Ira.

- Although, I think you've got a little typing mistake in there: "is in love with an imaginary and has a lost sister".

- There should be a noun of some sort after "imaginary".

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First chapter: 8/10

- At first, I felt a little off reading her introduction, but when we got to her "lost" sister, it was very intriguing. I'd say it was a nice first chapter!

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Grammar/punctuation: 9/10

- Overall, nice job!
You got a little bit of a typing mistake in the beginning of chapter 5: it's written in Ira's pov, but in a couple of places you wrote "Ira" instead of "I, me".

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Vocabulary: 8/10

- I think your vocabulary is nice, and always relative to the subject. Great job, it's a tough one.

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Plot/Pacing: 9/10

- Switching pov's so many times in a single chapter was a bit too much for me. I'd advise you to stick to one or two.

- I was waiting anxiously for any mention of her imaginary love, and dang it was so good. I loved the idea around him.

- I like that you didn't let go of the fact that Brandon had seemed fishy, but instead you mentioned the pills he was taking and linked it to the plot. Nice!

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Characters/character development: 8/10

- I think it was nice connecting with the characters, with each of them getting some little bit of spotlight so that we can get to know them. I feel it can be a tad better if you include more of their reactions, even if just briefly.

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Originality: 8/10

- I found the whole thing original so far, and I hope you continue down that path.

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World building: 8/10

- You story is based in the real world, but you managed to give it a twist and make it your own.

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Imagery: 8/10

- In some places, imagining everything was pretty smooth! But in others, I feel as if maybe you should work a little more on setting the scenes.

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Overall: I'm curious to see what happens next tbh, and keep going xx.

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Questions for the author:

- What do you think of the review? Did it help you improve?

- What kind of story are you going for? Tell us so we can understand you.

- What do you enjoy about writing? Tell us how it makes you feel.

- What is your writing process like?

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