A Murder in Disguise (Review Five)

99 10 18
                                    

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A Murder in Disguise by El_Pa_Ca1601
Reviewer: SilentLover0224

Book cover/title: 10/10

- The cover definitely portrayed what the story was about the title grab my attention and definitely demanded that I pay attention.

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Blurb: 10/10

- The way that you asked all those questions in your blurb definitely made people want to read that in my opinion. The questions motivated you to go through the story to see if there was an answer to all these questions, and it was absolutely amazing. I was not expecting this at all.

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First chapter: 8/10

- Compared to all the other chapters I've read, the first chapter doesn't really advance anything. It's more there or just too much information. Maybe if you describe the party a little bit more rather than rushing it all into one chapter, it definitely would've been really cool. However, it really did make me want to continue. There was nothing that made me question why am I reading this, it really did make you wanna continue to the next chapter and the next chapter and the next chapter.

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Grammar/punctuation: 9/10

-Your grammar was very good.  There was no major grammar mistakes that I saw. Punctuation was a little off in some places. At times, there wasn't a period or a, and it definitely could've made a sentence better or there was a period that didn't really belong there. Overall, I believe you did good, actually.

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Vocabulary: 10/10

- A good use of medical terms. Most of the time people don't know what a cataract artery is and so the fact that you knew that and you put it in there rather than saying her arm was a slit and she bled out was a really nice start.

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Plot/pacing: 10/10

- The parts of advances forward there is a lot of good events that happened that triggers the next event like she's at her friends play and it switches to the killer coming up with next to this man while he's at his locker and then switches back to her friend at her play and switches back to the killing so that was really cool.

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Character/character development: 7/10

- I feel like Emily as a character is underdeveloped. She doesn't really have goals or intentions. There's nothing stopping her from getting what she wants. It's just more of the character that receives the most trauma. But most of the other characters seem to be developed. I was definitely suspicious of Hannah so you did really good there.

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Originality: 10/10

- I kind of wonder how this actually came out of your brain because the plot is so well thought out. You definitely have your idea of where you wanna go. You did not reference anything cliché that I saw, and the fact that you didn't mention anything cliché is definitely a bonus because there's just so many things that are taken from another book or another person and just thrown into it and there's nothing original about that, but your book is one of the most original that I've seen in a very long time.

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World building: 10/10

- I could easily follow and I can definitely see what you were describing. I felt like I was in the room as you were telling the story. I definitely felt for what her name was when her roommate was killed and she walked in and she just felt dizzy and sick.

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Imagery: 10/10

- Beautiful story is very easy to follow the very beautiful language that you're using there. I could see everything and when you said that when she was cutting tomatoes it looked like running blood is very beautiful. I really love that because I can definitely connect with the juices of a tomato.  I'm actually very, very, very happy with this book it was really good.

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Overall: 10/10

- The book was really interesting. I feel like there could be so many more possibilities. I really love how there's so many deaths but at the same time it's every chapter so maybe try to space out the desk between like a couple chapters instead of having a death one chapter and then having a death in chapter 2 and then having a death in chapter 3 do you know what I mean?

- I'll admit I felt like I was reading an actual author's book here. I was kind of rooting for the chapters to keep going so I didn't have to end however I feel like Emily needs to be more developed. I hope you were trying to make Hannah suspicious because I felt that she was very suspicious.

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Questions for the author:

- What do you think of the review? Did it help you improve?

- What kind of story are you going for? Tell us so we can understand you.

- What do you enjoy about writing? Tell us how it makes you feel.

- What is your writing process like?

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