Secret Love Nest '21

Truth or Dare pt2

I'm neurotic. I overthink. Its a hobby of mine. My mind also has an extraordinary talent of imagining things and growing it out of proportions thats why I keep a diary to write down most of my crazy musings.

(Why are you enumerating things we already know about you?)

I'm neurotic...

(Oh goodness, are you going to repeat all of that? Dayu ah...snap out of it!)

As, I should do that, right? I should snap out of it and calm down. I mean, I'm not even sure how we got home last night from Jin's place or how Qing ended up sleeping in the couch. Maybe its the way I slammed shut the door of our bedroom to his face that gave Qing a clue that I don't want to be in the same bed with him last night. Hmmm...yeah, that must be it and not me threatening to kill him by smothering a pillow on his face as he sleep.

Surely its the door slamming.

(Goodness...)

Look, I have dark thoughts. Last night, my mind was not in its most stable condition.

All I know was that when I got out of our room this morning, I found Qing sitting on the couch with a folded blanket and pillow beside him. Qing looked out of it as well. Obviously disoriented. He was just sitting on the couch and staring at nothing in particular.

When I sat down on the other side of the couch, Qing moved his head to look at me. About the only clue that gave me an idea that he is still breathing.

Qing: (still looking stunned) Did last night really happened?

Me: (sighing) Tell me about it.

Qing: Dayu ah...

Me: (thinking) I keep racking my brain about what happened during that time you met this guy and for the life of me...I can't remember those days.

Qing: Me too. It was a long time ago, Dayu ah.

Me: (giving him a sharp look) Are you conditioning my mind to think nothing of it because it happened a long time ago?

Qing: (wincing) Maybe...?

Me: Well, for me...it happened just last night. Last night, Wang Qing!

Qing: (looking down) Right. You are right. You should be mad.

Me: Stop telling me what to feel.

Qing: Okay. I'm just gonna shut up now.

I think Qing's survival instinct was kicking in full gear at this point. His will to live told him to shut up if they don't want to be murdered by their fiancé.

Me: (after a moment of tense silence between) Was it just one time...or there were more...?

Qing: There was nothing. I didn't cheat on you, Dayu ah.

Me: But you thought about it.

Qing: For one crazy moment...yes. But I didn't do it. (frustrated) Shit!

I snatched a cushion pillow to throw it against his head.

Me: (glaring at him) Do you have rights to act and sound like that, huh? Huh?!

Qing: (mellowing down) No. Sorry...

Me: Oi, Wang Qing...I think we should get something straight between us. Last night, you confessed to experiencing desire for someone else besides me. I don't care if you just fantasized about fucking them and didn't actually did it. All I care about was for one split second, in your mind, you decided I was not enough for you and you...you...