Locatlie: The Truth. (Book 4)

Chapter 20

Hugo P.O.V

Regret.

That was the word that currently described me as a person. I regretted ever letting my guard down with Heather. I regretted thinking she was the perfect candidate for a wife. I regretted telling Julia that. I regretted voting for Heather in the first place. I regretted agreeing with Will that we shouldn't let Julia have a choice. I regretted getting drunk that night. I regretted thinking with my dick that night. I regretted touching Heather, kissing Heather, fucking Heather.

At first it had been extra hot because it wasn't allowed. I first suddenly understood why Trevor loved breaking the rules; the adrenaline was insane. The idea that I could get caught, it was fucking hot. Even the weeks after that, I did not feel regret. I knew that was wrong of me, I knew it was wrong that I did not regret fucking Heather. But that was because I needed it, it was unfinished business. But that business was done. The moment that I got numerous calls from Patrick stating he had to talk to me about something, I had this gut feeling what it was about. Yet when I heard her state those horrid words 'I am pregnant and it can only be yours', I could not help but be surprised.

That was when the regret came in, because I could not hide it any longer and I knew that Julia would be heartbroken. Her being heartbroken was an understatement. She was not the same ever since she found out. She breathed differently, she touched her face differently, she sat differently, she walked differently. Everything about her was different. I had hurt the only woman I had promised I would never hurt, in the most horrid way.

Regret.

I was being punished for my crime, for hurting my wife, with not being able to be around her. In the first couple of days, I expected her to not come running to me and to forgive and forget. I had hurt her in the most horrid way. But she was obsessed with me, she wanted me almost as much as I wanted her. She wanted to prove to me that she was worthy of my love. When she did not come running back to me, that hurt even more. When I saw how happy she was with Trevor and William, I felt like I wasn't wanted, I wasn't needed, as if I wasn't as important to her as she was to me. When I told Trevor this on Tuesday evening in the UK, he told me that I finally felt how she has felt our whole relationship. That me only feeling regret because I was caught, was fucked up. I had not thought of that before, but I didn't understand it before. I understood now. I was a dick.

I was the king of Locatlie, she had given her punishment to me.  But, she had decided to stay with the three of us. I, as the king, could force myself upon her to make sure I could give her an heir; that was my right as the king, and it was in the rulebooks. But, like always with her, I couldn't do that; I was making an exception. I could never hurt her anymore than I already did. William and Trevor would also never forgive me. But, I could use this small section of the rulebook to my advantage when we got back, or even now. 

The days went by a slur here, I had to listen to all these idiots talk about safety and camaraderie, while behind closed doors they were all fucking each other up the ass with nw policies, with new strategies. I had to be alert, I had to act as if I gave a fuck, because that was my role. But in reality, the only thing that was important to me, the only thing that I cared about, was the moment that we would first publicly see our wife every day. Because this was the only time that her lips touched mine.

I had not realised how amazing her lips felt, until I didn't have those lips on mine every single second. I knew she felt the same way too, I could see it behind her perfect grey eyes. Yet, she acted like she did not care, that it did not affect her in the same way I did and that pissed me off. I knew though, that if I were to get angry at her that Trevor would attack me, and I would not survive that.