Zindagi Bhar Ki Maut

Aaj v Dar Lagta Hai

She went to the garden for solitude. She sat on a bench in the garden with her knees close to her chest and arms around the legs. She was silently observing butterflies playing in the garden. Someone called her name and she turned to find Sumati standing there.

“Bondita meri bachi ek baar meri baat sun le, dekh mai jaanti hoon tu naaraz hai mujhse par maaf kar de mujhe. Mai nhi samajh paayi ki tere sath kya hone ja raha tha, mujhe laga Jamaibabu jo karenge tere bhale ke liye karenge isliye maine v saath diya unka. Aur wo sayad puri tarah galat nhi the, ek baar unhe mauka deke dekh unhe wapas apna le.” Sumati tried to convince her.

“Acha to aap apne Jamaibabu ki daleel leke aayi hai mere paas, khushi huyi Barrister Babu ki kismat dekh ke unki maa na hote huye v unke paas ek aisi maa hai jo hamesha unke sath khadi rahe chahe wo galat hi kyun na ho. Aur yahan mai kitni badnasib hoon paapin hoon jo meri khud ki maa ne v mera sath chod diya mere sahi hone par v.

Ek hi vinti hai meri aapse mai pehle se hi Mari huyi hoon mujhe aur mat maariye. In jhoothe rishton, is dikhawe ke pyaar se door rakhiye mujhe, mai aaj v tooti hoon ab itna chaknachur mat kijiye ki mai aur ladkiyon ko tootne se bacha na sakun.

Aapko apne Jamaibabu ki khushiyan chahiye, kar dijiye unka byaah kisi sundar haseen ladki se jisse wo pyaar kar sake. Mai chahun v to unhe unki Manorama nhi lauta sakti nah kash lauta sakti mai unki Manorama unhe.

Mai sirf aapke liye aur Jamaibabu ke liye dua de sakti hoon ki unhe unka koi pyaar mil jaye aur uske saath wo sukhi rahe jeevan me aur unki khushi me aap v khush rahengi nah, aapko to sirf unke sukh-dukh se lena dena hai.

Ab bhagwan ke liye chale jaiye yahan se. Aur himmat nhi hai mujhme kuch kehne ki ya kuch aur sehne ki chale jaiye yahan se.” she said sobbing.

“Par Bondita…” Sumati was cut off by Bondita immediately, “Chale Jaiye” she yelled.

Sumati covered her mouth with her pallu and went crying.

Bondita laid there on the bench and cried hard and dozed off there unknowingly. Anirudh saw her sleeping there hugging her knees, the marks of tears were on her face. He wanted her to caress her face but he stopped himself as Koeli & Bihari came there searching for Bondita and Anirudh walked away.

Koeli and Bihari didn’t want to disturb sleep of Bondu as they knew what she has went through, Koeli covered her with a blanket and sat there on the ground beside her and she also dozed off.

In morning Bon woke up and found Koeli there sleeping with her head on the bench she was sleeping, she had tears in her eyes.

“Koeli Didi uthiye” she said to Koeli in her sweet voice and put  hand on her shoulder.

Koeli woke up and asked, “Uth gyi aap maalkin, wo kal aap ko nind aa gyi thi to uthaya nhi kal jo kuch v hua uske baad aapko thode aaram ki zarurat thi.”

Bondita hugged Koeli tightly and started crying.

“Koeli Didi, aaj mai aapse kehna chahti hoon Koeli Didi aap meri maa v hai aur badi behen v. Meri Maa aur meri badi behen ne mera sath nhi diya, mujhe zakhmi karte rahe aur zakhmi hote dekhte rahe par aapne hamesha un zakhmo pe marham lagaye, hamesha saaath khadi rahi, hamesha himmat bandhti rahi meri.

Mai aaj se maa aur badi behen dono ohde deti hoon aapko. Par sach kahun Koeli Didi ab bahut dar lagta hai kisi ko koi ohda dene ya apna manne se, dar lagta hai ki kab koi apna jise mai bahut kuch maanu mere dil ko challi na kar dein. Bahut dar lagta hai Koeli Didi.” She said sobbing and hugging her more tightly.

Koeli was caressing her head and said, “Dugga Maa pe bharosa rakhiye maalkin sab thik ho jayega. Mujhe pura vishwas hai Dugga Maa pe wo apki khushiuan wapas dengi aapko, himmat rakhiye aap.”

“Nhi Koeli Didi ab khushi shabd sun ke v dukh aur taklif hoti hai mujhe. Aur meri khushi ab nhi laut sakti wo kab ka choot gyi piche, wo chahe v to ab mujh tak nhi pahuch sakti.

Aapko pata hai Koeli Didi kash us coti ka sach bahar na aata aur Manorama Ji ke jagah mai hoti us dhamake me kash wo coti maine na utari hoti wahi fat jata wo bomb mujhe leke,  kitna khush hote nah Patibabu unhe unki manpasand patni unka pyaaar mil jata zindagi bhar ke liye khushi khushi aur unke khushiyon ke raaste ka patthar unke sar ka bojh hamesha hamesha ke liye unki zindagi se chali jaati. Khushiyan hi khushiyan hoti unki zindagi me, koi gham nhi hota.

Aaj fir mai unki aankhon ki kirkiri bn baithi hoon,chubh rahi hoon unki aankhon me, aansoo de rahi unki aankho me. Yehi dur karne aayi hoon Koeli Didi, ab hamesha ke liye chali jaungi, aur kuch aisa karke jaungi ki wo aur unka pariwar aur unki Sumati Maa sab hamesha khush rahe.” She said firmly yet with teary eyes.

“Aaj v aapko baki sab ki khushiyon ki parwah hai pure dil se, aap ke jaisa khara sona khoya hai Anirudh Babu ne, kabhi nhi khu…….” Koeli was about to complete but Bondita stopped Koeli by putting her hand on Koeli’s mouth and nodded in a no.

“Nhi didi gusse me kuch aisa mat kahiyega, dua bhale na lage par baddua kisi ki jaldi lag jati hai.” Bondita said and Koeli went from there with teary eyed nodding her head.

Bondita was watching Koeli going and was lost in some thought and silently shedding tears.

And someone too nearby her was shedding tears silently and this someone was none other than Anirudh again witnessing the affect of his deeds.

He was crying but his tears cannot heal her wounds, cannot fix her broken heart, her crushed down trust, cannot get her back what was snatched from her, cannot turn her humiliations into honour, cannot soothe her pain,cannot lessen the sufferings she had to go through, can it?